


Only One Bed

by IndelibleEvidence



Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: AND THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED!, F/M, Season 2, Slow Burn, idiots are idiots about their feelings for way more time than is plausible, predictable fic is predictable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:41:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24890092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IndelibleEvidence/pseuds/IndelibleEvidence
Summary: After ending up in North Dakota for a case, Jane and Kurt decide to road trip home when a storm prevents them from flying. The storm catches up to them, and they're forced to take a room at the first motel they come across - and there's only one bed... A fluffy, smutty, completely predictable Jeller fic, set after 2x19.
Relationships: Jane Doe/Kurt Weller
Comments: 27
Kudos: 63





	1. Road Trip

**Author's Note:**

> All of my WIPs are really angsty and depressing right now, and I found myself wanting to write something that's a little bit lighter and fluffier. It's going to be 100% predictable, but the whole 'only one bed' thing is such a classic trope, and I just can't help myself. :D
> 
> This is set between 2x19 (the escape room/polygraph episode) and 2x20 (the Zapata's undercover in jail episode). I know the transition between those two episodes is really fast in canon, but I decided to fiddle around with things a little bit. So imagine that Kurt got to say his 'all this led me to you and you to me' line in the bar, but he was interrupted before he started leaning in to kiss Jane, and then they all finished drinking and went home, without any more romantic overtures or getting any tattoo leads (I dunno, maybe Kurt got cold feet or something).
> 
> So that was at the start of the week, and this fic starts on the Friday of the same week, wrapping up a case that's ended up with the team in North Dakota (no, I have no idea why, but that's not important). Reade is still on leave with his PTSD, so that's why he's not with them at the start. Oh, and the Roman-killed-Emma-Shaw thing isn't happening, because that's way too depressing for the fic I want to write. :p

**Bismarck, North Dakota**

“So we can’t go home?” Zapata asked in disbelief.

“Not on the FBI jet. There are only so many takeoffs they’re allowing before the storm gets too bad, and we’re not a priority because we’re just on our way home, without a suspect in custody.” Kurt shrugged. “Nothing we can do about it but wait for the storm to pass.”

He glanced over at Jane, who was frowning up at the sky outside the large airport window. The wind was already driving raindrops hard against the glass, and the storm would only get worse from here.

“No, Weller, you don’t understand. My eldest niece’s _quinceañera_ is tomorrow. My brother will disown me if I’m not there.” Tasha pulled out her phone and frantically typed something into it. “There has to be a commercial flight we can take before everything shuts down.”

Jane joined them, sighing. “Guess I’ll need to call Roman and tell him I won’t be back tonight.”

“Ah! There are seats left on a flight that leaves in thirty-five minutes…” Zapata jabbed at her touch-screen, then groaned. “But there are only two of them. Damn it.”

“You guys go,” Jane said. “I’m not afraid of flying like I used to be, but I’d still rather wait this one out on the ground. And hey, it’s almost the weekend, right? If Kurt’s okay with it, I can maybe take Monday off and take a road trip back in a rental car.”

“In a storm this bad?” Kurt asked uneasily. “It’s not exactly road trip weather.”

“I might be able to drive far enough to get clear before it hits. And if not, I’ll just hit a motel and take shelter until it clears up.” Jane shrugged. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Weller, I’m booking this flight, with or without you,” Zapata warned, inputting details.

Kurt hesitated for only a moment before he made up his mind. Leaving Jane to drive back alone, potentially through a storm strong enough to ground planes, would just lead to a weekend of him worrying about her safety.

It was stupid, really. Jane was one of the most resilient people he’d ever met. But if he flew home without her now, he knew he wouldn’t relax until he saw her again.

“Room for one more on your road trip?” he asked Jane, keeping his voice as casual as he could. “I don’t want you driving back alone, not in this weather. If there are two of us, we can take turns behind the wheel, make sure neither of us gets tired.”

Jane’s eyebrows lifted as he spoke, but she quickly schooled her expression. “Sure, as long as you mean that, and you don’t insist on driving the whole way back.”

“Okay, so that’s a no, Weller?” Zapata looked stressed.

“Go ahead, Tash. I’m good.”

A few tense seconds later, a relieved smile dawned on Zapata’s face. “Oh, thank god—it went through.”

She gave them both a quick hug goodbye and disappeared towards the security checkpoint, leaving Jane and Kurt to exchange a slightly awkward glance.

“We should probably get going if we want to leave the storm behind. I’ll find us a rental car while you grab us some snacks?” he suggested.

“Shouldn’t _I_ be hiring the car? It was my idea,” she said.

He pulled out his wallet. “Under normal circumstances, yeah. But since this was a work-related trip, I can put it on the FBI’s tab.”

Jane gave him one of the small, soft smiles that always made his pulse quicken. “In that case… I’ll come find you in a few minutes.”

As they walked off in separate directions, Kurt firmed his resolve. _This isn’t leading to anything. It’s just a road trip with a friend._

_A friend, and a co-worker, and not someone you had to talk yourself out of kissing a few days ago. Not someone who was dating someone else until recently, while it ate you up inside that she wasn’t with you._

_Fuck, this is a bad idea. But it’s too late to take it back now._

* * *

The last thing Jane had expected was to be spending the weekend road tripping back to the East Coast with Kurt, but she couldn’t help but smile as she buckled her seatbelt. “Okay, I have one condition for letting you drive the first few hours.”

He manoeuvred the car away from the airport, shooting a swift glance her way before returning his attention to the road. “Yeah? Looks like I’m already driving, so…”

“Yeah, but this whole thing was my idea, so you owe me for letting you tag along. Here’s my condition: you only get to listen to one Johnny Cash album between here and New York.”

He gave her a frown that was mostly for show. “Blasphemy. What else are you supposed to listen to on a road trip?”

“It’s not like I _hate_ Johnny Cash…but there’s a big difference between driving across the city and driving halfway across the whole continent,” she told him, rolling her eyes. “There’s only so much I can take.”

Kurt reached for the radio dial. “Okay, but I have a condition, too.”

“Name it.”

“We don’t drive more than three hours before we stop for burgers.”

Jane grinned. “I think I can just about deal with that.”

They’d been sharing a car since the first day Jane had worked a case with the team, so the atmosphere was familiar and comfortable as they drove the first few miles of their journey, despite the novelty of the overall situation. Jane planned their route while Kurt drove, the radio playing quietly in the background of their discussion.

When a Johnny Cash song began on the radio, he turned it up, insisting that it didn’t count as part of his one-album quota because it wasn’t something he’d planned to listen to in advance. Jane gave a token grumble and reached for the potato chips she’d bought at the airport, unable to hide her amusement.

They stopped on the outskirts of Fargo to eat— _not a big deal, just dinner with a friend you’re travelling home with, even if he’s way more relaxed than usual, and it’s hotter than it has any right to be—_ then got back on the road as the rain intensified. Their meal hadn’t taken long, but the storm quickly caught up with them.

An hour later, Jane was struggling to see the road, the wipers barely able to clear the torrential downpour from the windscreen before more rain replaced it. Strong gusts of wind battered the car, and she glanced across at Kurt, slowing her speed.

“What do you think? Call it a day and start again early tomorrow?”

He looked up from his phone. “Yeah, I was just thinking the same thing. Take the next exit and there should be a motel within a mile.”

“A half-decent motel, or a creepy, run-down, perfect-set-up-for-a-horror-movie motel?” she asked wryly.

“No major complaints in the reviews, but I can’t promise there won’t be a serial killer there.”

Jane snorted, remembering the movie she’d seen on late-night TV the previous weekend. “You watch _Identity_ last week, too?”

He glanced over, seeming a little surprised. “Yeah. You watch with Roman?”

“He was reading. I was watching.” She noticed the signs for the exit up ahead. “Let’s just stay out of the laundry room.”

He laughed under his breath, the sound almost drowned out by a loud rumble of thunder. ”Deal.”

They managed to book the last two available rooms—other travellers had obviously had the same idea they had—and grabbed their go-bags from the backseat of the car. It was barely seven o’clock, way too early to sleep, so Kurt suggested he’d drop by Jane’s room in an hour, after they’d both had time to shower and settle in.

The two rooms were on opposite sides of the U-shaped, single-storey motel. Luckily, it was possible to walk around from one side of the U to the other without stepping out of shelter into the downpour. Jane quickly located her allocated room and fitted the key into the lock.

“Oh, great.” She stopped in the doorway, staring at the leaking ceiling directly over the bed, and the large, spreading wet patch across the pillows and comforter. This was one bed she definitely wouldn’t be able to sleep in tonight.

But there were no other rooms available, so she’d just have to deal with sleeping on the floor, assuming she could get the motel staff to supply a dry blanket and pillow.

She sent a quick text to Kurt. _My room has a leak right over the bed, so we should probably hang out in your room instead of mine._

A couple of minutes later, there was a knock on her door, and she opened it to admit Kurt. “You really didn’t have to come over here—it’s fine. I’ll just sleep on the floor.”

Kurt took one look at the bed and shook his head. “Let’s…just get a refund on this room, and you can take half of my bed. I promise not to steal the blankets.”

 _Oh, god. Spending time in Kurt’s room was already gonna be a little awkward, but sharing a_ bed _with him? With all the history between us?_

Flustered, Jane scrambled for words that wouldn’t betray her conflicted thoughts. “We’re already spending so much time together this weekend. I don’t wanna drive you crazy by sharing your room, too.”

He rolled his eyes. “After all the time we’ve spent together on the job, I think I can handle a few more hours. Sure, it’s not ideal, but it’s just one night, Jane.”

She hesitated, mentally searching for some other solution—one that wouldn’t end up with them in the same bed, trying to pretend they’d never attempted to be more than friends. Those days were far in the past now. He was over her. But she would never be over him, not entirely, and if he realised that, it would make the rest of the road trip—and their working relationship—far more complicated.

Sensing her reserve, he said, “If you really would rather have your own room, you should take mine. I’ll take the floor in here.”

Now _that_ was completely unacceptable. “No, I…” She sighed, giving in. “Okay. Let’s go get a refund before the storm takes out the power or something.”

Kurt’s hand grazed the small of her back as they left the room, and Jane fought a thrill of arousal. _Don’t get ideas. This is the most logical arrangement in an unusual situation. It’s not going to lead to anything._

_Not even if he did sort of look like he wanted to kiss you a few days ago, after the case with the escape room and the polygraph. That was wishful thinking. If he’d wanted to kiss you, he’d have done it at the end of the night, after Zapata and Patterson left._

_You ruined any chance you had with Kurt before you even met him for the first time, and then you made it worse by lying to him. You’re lucky he ever got to a point where he was willing to be friends again._

_Nothing is going to happen._


	2. Self-Distraction

Kurt closed the door behind them, shutting out the storm raging outside. Now it was just him, Jane…and a room dominated by a double bed.

 _Is the universe testing me? Because this is the one test I don’t know if I can pass._ Spending all evening sitting on a bed with Jane—before sliding under the covers to sleep next to her all night—was going to be torment.

Dismissing the thought, he glanced over at her. “You want to take the first shower?”

She looked up from rummaging in her go-bag. “As long as that’s okay with you.”

Kurt shrugged and sat on the edge of the bed. “Go ahead.”

Jane flashed him a quick smile, then pulled a toiletry bag and a bundle of clothing out of her military-style duffel. _Guess you can take the girl out of the military, but you can’t take the military out of the girl._

“I won’t be long,” she said, and headed into the bathroom.

Kurt waited until he heard the shower running to settle back against the headboard with the TV remote in hand, heaving a sigh that was equal parts relief and trepidation.

He _had_ to keep it together. He’d already slipped too far earlier this week, when he’d admitted under the Garen sisters’ polygraph that Jane had gotten back inside his walls. And later on, discussing the case with Jane during a quiet moment alone at the bar, he’d been so damn close to leaning in to kiss her, the alcohol loosening his tongue enough for him to tell her that despite Shepherd’s manipulation, he’d never want to undo the way they’d been brought together.

Every time she looked at him with that shy hesitance, as though she thought she wasn’t worthy of being complimented or told she was important, he just forgot everything—how to be her boss, how to stop gazing into those big, beautiful eyes…

He focused on the TV, trying not to think about the fact that Jane was naked in the next room, hot water and soap streaming over the tattoo of his name across her upper back, down every curve and dip of her body. He wanted to be in there with her, to drink droplets of water from her throat as he pressed her back against the bathroom tiles and—

_Stop._

He channel-hopped, hoping the varying images on the screen would divert his attention before his cock started to take too much notice. As a distraction technique, it wasn’t too bad, especially when a news report about a shooting in Portland commanded his attention. He lingered on the channel for long enough to reassure himself that his sister and nephew were unlikely to have been in the crossfire. Even then, he still sent a quick text to his sister, checking on her.

Jane didn’t take the time to luxuriate in the shower, emerging with heat-flushed skin and damp hair only a few minutes after she’d gone into the bathroom. The scent of her usual soap and shampoo drifted over to him, stronger than he was used to, and he closed his eyes for a moment, fighting his desire.

“Anything good on TV?” Jane asked, stuffing her clothing from earlier into her bag.

He stood up, knowing his self-control wouldn’t last long if he remained in the room. “Nothing jumped out at me. Put whatever you want on—I’ll probably read for a while, if you don’t mind.”

She positioned pillows against the headboard on her side of the bed, settling herself down cross-legged, while he sorted through his bag for everything he’d need in the bathroom. “Doesn’t bother me. I’ll do some sketching.”

Kurt headed into the bathroom, still unable to relax even with the closed door between him and Jane. Her scent surrounded him, floating on the steam from her shower, and as he stripped naked and stepped under the spray, he knew a cold shower would only fix the problem until he warmed up again.

Jerking off in the shower felt illicit with Jane so close by, but this was a situation he’d never expected to be in when he’d offered to accompany her on her road trip, and he had serious doubts about his ability to hide how much he wanted her if he didn’t do _something_ to take the edge off.

 _And you_ have _to hide it, Weller. Maybe one day, things will calm down enough that we can give it one more try. But we can’t get distracted now._

_No matter how much you want to drag her into your lap and remind her how things were between you, before everything got so damn twisted up in Sandstorm._

Remembering when she’d gazed up at him with unguarded, unashamed desire, confessing that she’d wanted a moment that was just for them, he swallowed a groan and took hold of his hard cock. Resting one hand on the tiles in front of him, he lost himself in thoughts of sharing his bed with Jane, until his own confident touch brought his pent-up frustration to the tense, trembling moment before orgasm.

He wanted to spoon up against her, leave hot, breathless kisses all over her neck and shoulder as she ground her ass back against his hard-on, then tilted forward to rub her clit all over his fingers. She’d be so wet for him, shaking through a powerful climax before she turned over and rolled him onto his back, leaning down to kiss him hungrily as she began to ride his cock—

Within a minute, he was coming, the silent, shuddering pleasure of his release giving way to a guiltily satisfied afterglow. _Jane…ah, fuck…_

He was in way over his head right now, but he had to keep his head on straight. He was her boss, her partner, her friend. That was all they could be, because every time they took a step to get closer, life would wrench them apart.

He didn’t want either of them to hurt that way again.

* * *

Kurt was more relaxed when he came out of the bathroom, which was a relief. He’d been a little abrupt before, but the hot water seemed to have loosened him up. Now he was sprawled out on his stomach on his side of the bed, checking his phone.

He smelled so good that she wanted to bury her face in his neck and inhale his scent—familiar and masculine, sexy enough to make heat curl through her abdomen and settle between her thighs.

_Don’t go there. This is just two friends hanging out on a Friday night._

_Two friends who’ve made out in the past. Spending the night on a bed. And then_ in _the bed._

She turned to a fresh page in her sketchpad and tapped her pencil against the blank paper, searching for a distracting subject to draw. Unfortunately, the most interesting thing in the room was Kurt, which didn’t help her mind switch tracks. _Wonder if I can sketch him without him noticing._

“At least Tasha made it home okay,” Kurt said, reaching for the giant bag of Skittles on the bed between them.

“You don’t regret going back with her? You could be at home now, doing…whatever you do on a weekend these days.” She didn’t know. Now that Sarah and Sawyer had moved to the West Coast, and his father was dead, how _did_ he spend his weekends? She hadn’t spent one with him since before the black site.

“Watching sports, going to the gym, trying to find a new angle on the Sandstorm case?” He gave her an amused look. “No. This is a nice change of pace. Good company, atmospheric weather, something to read… Nowhere I’d rather be.”

 _I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else, either._ A little flustered, she looked down at her sketchpad.

Before the silence could get awkward, she changed tack, pointing out the part he hadn’t mentioned. “I guess it saves you worrying about me all weekend, too.”

He shrugged. “Doesn’t hurt. I know you can take care of yourself, but Shepherd has people everywhere. I don’t like the thought of you being a thousand miles away without backup if you need it.”

“I appreciate it…even though it’s not necessary.” Jane gestured towards his phone, half wanting to carry on the conversation, and half hoping she’d distract him enough that his focus would shift to the reading he was planning to do. “New Winston Pear book?”

“Not this time. James Patterson.” He hesitated, frowning, then added, “No relation to _our_ Patterson—as far as I know.”

“Ahh. I keep meaning to try him. He has so many books that I never know where to start.” _Plus these days I’m too worried about Sandstorm to focus on reading anything that’s not work-related._

His expression brightened a little. “Remind me, when we’re back in New York. I’ll grab a couple off my bookshelves for you to try.”

“Thanks. I’d like that. It might take me a while to get through them, though. Between living with Roman and worrying about the case, I’m not too focused right now.”

Concern sparked in his gaze. “Everything okay?”

She shrugged. “Yeah. Just can’t switch my brain off, I guess.”

Kurt nodded slowly. “One way or another, this is gonna be over soon. Just hang in there, Jane.”

“You don’t have to worry about me. Really.”

The look in his eyes was almost tender. “If worrying about people you care about was optional, life would be a lot simpler.”

“Yeah,” Jane conceded, looking down at the pencil in her hand. “I guess it would.”

She began to doodle, needing to hide from the intensity of the moment before it got too far under her skin. A lone tree took shape under her pencil nib, standing in a field of long grass, a storm raging all around it. It occupied her for a few minutes, and when she dared to glance across at Kurt, he was immersed in the book he was reading on his phone.

She took a moment to observe him out of the corner of her eye—subject and muse rolled into one breathtakingly handsome human being—and settled her sketchpad at a better angle as she began to draw.

When her words and even her thoughts failed her, drawing was the outlet that still allowed her to process what she was feeling—and even if he noticed that she was sketching him, he wouldn’t be able to perceive the emotions beneath. She could point out that nothing else in the room was interesting enough to draw, and he’d accept that as the reason for her focus.

Sometimes she was almost certain he was still interested in her, but after everything she’d done to hurt him, she’d forbidden herself from making the first move—and Kurt played everything by the book. Being attracted to someone was one thing, but he also felt acutely responsible for everyone under his leadership at the NYO. He would always put work first, because that was just how he was.

Between her guilt and his restraint, there was no way they’d ever resume where they’d left off, even if he did still feel the same pull towards her as she did towards him.

And she was okay with that, because she’d thought she’d lost his respect forever. She treasured the friendship they’d slowly built up over the past few months, building on the ruins of the person he’d thought she was to something more solid and comfortable.

_Just take what you have and be happy with it. Anything else is just greedy._


	3. Darkness

By some miracle, Kurt was able to focus on his book. For almost two hours, he and Jane kept a comfortable silence, broken only by the quiet brushes of her pencils over her sketchbook, and the background murmur of the TV—some documentary on deep-sea marine life he was pretty sure he’d seen before.

When his muscles began to ache from remaining in one place for too long, he surfaced from the fictional world he’d been immersed in, rolling onto his back and glancing over at Jane. “How’s it going?”

She looked up from her sketchbook and smiled, and his heart skipped. _She’s so damn beautiful when she’s relaxed like this._

“Not too bad. How’s the book?”

“Pretty good. Think I know who the bad guy is, though.” He sat up slowly, rolling the stiffness out of one shoulder.

“You’re an FBI agent. I’d be surprised if you _didn’t_ know,” she teased.

His gaze fell on her sketchbook, angled away from him against her bent knee. “Can I see?”

She hesitated, but before he could reassure her that she could keep her privacy, she held out the book. “Okay, but don’t get mad at my choice of subject.”

He was about to ask why she’d think he would, but then his attention shifted to the page, and he forgot how to form words for a moment.

There were a few basic sketches at the corners—a tree in a storm, and a few deep-sea creatures she must have doodled as she’d watched the documentary on TV—but two-thirds of the page was taken up by a lifelike drawing of Kurt, reading on his phone with his face in profile. There was so much detail in the image, right down to the look of absorption in his expression, and he found himself shaking his head in admiration.

“This is how you see me?”

She shrugged, clearly uncomfortable. “It’s how you looked a few minutes ago.”

“You’re really talented. You know that, right?” He held her gaze, wanting her to know he was being sincere.

“Thanks. Just takes practice.” She held out her hand for the book, and he passed it back, taking the hint that she wanted to retreat from the subject.

“Well, if you decide you want a quieter life once we’ve taken down Sandstorm, at least you have a less chaotic skill to—”

He lost his train of thought mid-sentence, as everything in the room powered by electricity blinked out—lights, the TV, the charging light on his phone…

In the unexpected darkness, Jane groaned. “When I said the power might go out earlier, I was joking, not suggesting.”

She got up from the bed and went to the window, pulling back the curtain to look out into the rain. “Looks like the whole place is dark. A couple of the other guests are on their way over to complain to the motel staff, but I doubt they can do anything unless they have a backup generator.”

“Think it’s the storm, or _Sand_ storm?” Kurt felt for the weapon he’d left on the nightstand, checking the safety by feel before tucking it into his pants at the small of his back.

“Probably the storm—but I guess we’ll know different if someone throws a smoke grenade through the window,” she replied dryly, making a beeline for her own gun.

“We should give it thirty minutes, just to be sure it really _is_ the weather…but if we don’t get power back, we should probably get an early night. I doubt the motel’s insurance policy is good enough to let them start handing out candles.” This wasn’t the way he’d ever imagined suggesting to Jane that they go to bed, but he shouldn’t be complaining, since he was trying to avoid the other possibility.

“Yeah—better to get some rest than sit around in the dark,” Jane agreed, her voice distracted.

After a long pause, Kurt laughed under his breath. “There used to be a time when a power outage just meant the weather had taken out a cable somewhere. Maybe I’m just getting paranoid.”

“Better a little paranoid than taken by surprise. I doubt this is an attack, though. We’re still nearly a thousand miles from where we’re supposed to be, and there’s no reason for them to come after us right now, anyway.”

“None that we know of.” When it came to Shepherd, he didn’t feel comfortable making assumptions, and he could tell Jane felt the same way, even without seeing her face.

Jane sat back down on the bed, and as Kurt’s eyes adjusted to the darkness, he saw her putting her service weapon down on the mattress, within easy reach. She sighed. “Guess I _should_ start coming up with alternate career ideas, just in case Pellington wants me out after my case is through.”

He looked over at her sharply, unable to discern her features through the gloom. “I’ll handle Pellington.”

“I know you’d _try_. But he doesn’t like me, and frankly, I don’t blame him. Who’d put up with a fox in their henhouse for a minute longer than they had to?” Her voice was resigned, as though she was already planning her departure for as soon as the NSA approved her immunity deal.

The idea alarmed him more than he’d ever expected. The joint NSA/FBI taskforce had begun with such distrust and anger on all sides—he would never have thought that its eventual dissolution would feel so viscerally _wrong._

“Hey.” He couldn’t see her hand through the gloom, but he could tell from her silhouette where her knee was positioned. He reached out and slid his hand over it, needing her to know he had her back. “If you want to go, I won’t stop you. But if you want to stay, I’ll do anything I can to make him see things my way. _Everything_ I can _._ You’ve earned your place with us.” _With me._

She rested her hand on top of his, sending a tingle through his skin. “Thank you.”

Kurt squeezed her knee, trying to resist the impulse to turn his hand over and entwine his fingers with hers. _Too much, Weller. Get some distance._

He got up. “I’m gonna go do a little recon—as much as I can without getting soaked, anyway. If we can be sure it really was the storm that caused this, we can sleep easier.”

“Be careful.” Was it his imagination, or was her voice a little huskier than usual, as though she’d been affected by their contact?

“Always am.” _Except for when it comes to controlling yourself around Jane, apparently._

Suppressing the urge to shake his head at his own folly, he shrugged on his jacket to hide his service weapon, then headed out into the night.

* * *

Jane exhaled hard, sagging back against the headboard as soon as she was alone in the room. _That was…intense._

Kurt had sounded as though nothing was more important to him than making sure she could stay with him. _At work. Stay with him at work._

Maybe he just wanted to make sure she was rewarded for putting her life on the line to fight her own mother, and to preserve the effective partnership they had at work. But the way he’d spoken seemed more personal, as though he’d never considered that Pellington would try to dismiss her again, and he was fiercely determined to prevent that from happening.

She was probably just reading too much into his tone of voice. The darkness didn’t help her to judge what he was thinking. But the moment had still made her pulse skip, especially when he’d reached out to her, laying a strong, reassuring hand over her knee.

_You’re just extra hormonal because you know you’re gonna be sharing a bed with him all night. Calm down and focus. He might need backup._

For the next five minutes, she remained alert, listening for gunshots or sounds of a struggle—until Kurt re-entered the room with a quick knock, so she’d know it was him.

“Good news and bad news,” he said, as she watched his silhouette shrug off his jacket. “The good news? It’s not Sandstorm.”

Jane hadn’t realised how tense she was until she relaxed. “And the bad news?”

“Someone drove out to see if they could spot the problem—a tree limb took out one of the power cables just up the road. Which means we’ll be without power until we check out tomorrow.”

Jane shrugged, despite the fact that he might not be able to pick up on it. “As bad news goes, that’s not the worst I was expecting—though maybe my perspective is skewed by all the bombs and life-or-death situations we’ve been in.”

“Sometimes I have to remind myself that my concept of bad news is a lot worse than most people’s,” he agreed, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Think you can sleep, if we wait this one out by getting an early night?”

“Well, since the alternative is wearing out our cell phone batteries by using them as flashlights, then being out of contact in an emergency…I guess we don’t have much of an alternative.” Jane stood up and headed for the bathroom. “I’m gonna brush my teeth.”

After completing as much of her nightly routine as possible in the dark, she returned to the bedroom, glad it was too dim for Kurt to pick up on any traces of apprehension—or worse, anticipation—in her expression. “All yours.”

“Huh?” He was standing at the window, looking out through a gap in the curtains at the rain lashing down and bouncing off the pavement.

“The bathroom,” she clarified. _And me, if that were still possible. But it’s not._

“Thanks. You okay with taking the side of the bed you were sitting on earlier?”

“Yeah, unless you’d rather have it? I’m good either way.” She felt across the side of the bed she’d been occupying, scooping up stray pencils and taking care not to spill the remaining Skittles in the bag they’d been sharing.

“No, I usually sleep on the side I was using.” He hesitated, then headed for the bathroom. “Back in a minute.”

Jane pulled back the covers on the bed, wondering if the universe was laughing at her. _Even the sides of the bed we sleep on are compatible._ She couldn’t decide if she found it more amusing or tragic, given that they’d never share a bed again after tonight.

_Maybe, considering that, I should take advantage of the situation._

Jane shoved that thought to the back of her mind the moment it registered, but it was too late—it had already sparked provocative ideas in her imagination. _What would he do, if I rolled over and kissed him?_

She didn’t need to imagine the way he’d kiss her back. She remembered all too well how it felt to be in his arms, the hungry affection of his kisses making the rest of the world fade to nothing, the awareness of every warm caress sending tingles through her skin.

Even the distant memories were enough to turn her on, so when Kurt got into bed beside her, everything was going to be a thousand times more intense. At least the darkness would hamper some of his all-too-perceptive special agent instincts—all she’d have to worry about were her voice and the rhythm of her breathing. And making sure she didn’t accidentally brush against him.

Sliding under the covers, Jane attempted to banish her nerves and simmering arousal, curling around her pillow with her back to the empty side of the bed. She was a night owl and a light sleeper at the best of times. Between the early bedtime, the storm and the presence of another person, she’d likely get a terrible night’s sleep—but maybe Kurt would fare better, and be open to taking the first driving shift tomorrow, so she could nap in the passenger seat.

She’d just begun to relax when he came out of the bathroom, making her tense right up again. Quietly, he got into bed beside her, not close enough to touch, and heaved a sigh as the mattress went still.

Jane counted her heartbeats, forgetting to breathe, even as she ordered herself to calm the hell down.

After a long moment, Kurt murmured, barely above a whisper, “You still awake, Jane?”

_In more ways than one._

“Mmm,” she said, glad that she sounded sleepier than she felt.

He reached over for his phone, and an electronic glow lit the room. “Any preference for what time we get up tomorrow?”

She frowned into the darkness, unsure. “I’m usually a pretty early riser, even when I _don’t_ go to bed before ten—plus we have a lot of driving to do. On the other hand, there’s not enough room for my morning exercise routine in here, and I guess the weather will decide when we should get back on the road. Well,” she added, amused, “the weather, and how long you want to sleep in.”

“I’m not _that_ bad—but it _is_ the weekend.” He sighed again. “How about…seven? And we can maybe find a diner and grab some breakfast before we get back on the interstate?”

“Sounds good. You setting an alarm?” She doubted she’d need one.

“Yeah. You have my permission to throw a pillow at me if I switch it off and go back to sleep.”

“Am I a bad person for kind of hoping that happens, now?” She couldn’t help but grin, snuggling deeper into the pillow in question.

His voice was rich with amusement. “Hey, you want a pillow fight, Doe, you can challenge me anytime.”

Jane snorted. “You sure you want to go there? Because you know I’d kick your ass.”

“You say that like it would bother me.” His complete lack of concern was evident—he’d never seemed threatened by her skills, or by being beaten by a woman, which was one of the things she’d always loved about him.

 _Liked_ about him.

“Well, since I’ve wiped the floor with you almost every time we’ve ever sparred, I guess you must be getting used to it by now.”

He laughed softly, his amusement sending a shiver of lust through her skin. Lying here in the dark, talking like this—it was so much more intimate than she’d feared, yet strangely comfortable, despite the situation.

Even with her back to him and in total darkness, she could paint a clear picture in her mind of what he would look like—lying on his back, with one arm pillowed under his head, one side of his mouth tilted up in a smile.

Her instinctive urge to press her breasts and hips down into the mattress would only make her arousal worse. _Stay still._

“Really, though—thank you. A lot of guys would let their egos ruin this.” _Just don’t ask me what ‘this’ is. Because I don’t know if I even have the words for it._

Was it his imagination, or did his slow exhalation tremble a little? _No. Wishful thinking._

“A lot of guys would be missing out,” he said, his voice soft.

Jane reminded herself to breathe normally, biting her lip as desire warmed her skin. _How do I respond to that?_

Again, she imagined herself rolling over and finding him in the dark, guiding his lips to hers by feel alone, letting him drag her on top of him and sink his fingers into her hair as their kiss became hotter, more urgent…

 _How do I respond to that_ without _destroying our friendship and making everything ten times more complicated?_

“I promise you won’t have to fend off any flying pillows in the night.” She hesitated, then said, “Sleep well, Kurt.”

He shifted on the bed, getting more comfortable in preparation to fall asleep. “Sweet dreams, Jane.”


	4. Dawn

Kurt cracked one eye open, wondering what time it was. The room was light enough to have woken him, but his alarm had yet to go off.

Jane was lying less than two feet away from him, her face turned towards his, and he forgot everything else. Her eyes were closed, her features relaxed and unguarded, and Kurt couldn’t help a small smile as he gazed at her.

God, she was beautiful, but that word wasn’t enough to do his feelings justice. When he looked at her, his appreciation wasn’t just because she was an attractive woman—it was more than that, anchored in the emotional recognition of what she represented in his mind. He felt warmth, protectiveness, admiration, wistfulness.

At one point, this quiet contemplation of her would never have been something he’d allowed himself. Things between them had never been simple, but since he’d found Taylor’s body, the complex layers of pained betrayal, worry, suspicion and self-doubt had made it difficult for him to be around her—or at least, when he’d found his gaze gravitating instinctively towards her, the negative emotions had deterred him from continuing to look.

Sometime between then and now, things had shifted again. Gradually, at first; when he’d been dating Nas, he hadn’t wanted to make the woman he was with uncomfortable with the reminder of how close he and Jane used to be, or give the impression that he was pining after her. _Even though you_ were _pining after her._

Then he’d realised Jane was in a relationship, just as he was adjusting to being single after Nas’ departure. He’d struggled with it, but had avoided looking at her for too long because it had hurt like hell to know that she was moving on. _Which makes you an asshole, because you dated someone for months before she found someone._

These days, he avoided watching her because he didn’t know how to deal with how strong his feelings were, and didn’t want her to catch on before he decided what to do about them. Her short fling with Oliver should have been a wake-up call— _had_ been a wake-up call, in some ways—but he was paralysed by the knowledge that neither of them could afford to be distracted by _anything_ right now, much less each other. Phase Two could start any day now, and they still had no idea what it entailed, or what it targeted.

And even though part of him was sure that Jane still felt the same way she once had about him, another part was terrified that between his mistakes and hers, they could never succeed in being more than friends. Recently, his aversion to watching her was caused by a fear of rejection—not because his ego would be bruised, but because the thought of losing what they’d slowly rebuilt made him sick to his stomach.

_Just admit it. You need her so much that you’re prepared to pine after her from a distance forever, if the alternative is losing her friendship._

_You love her._

The realisation should have been something that swept him away in a tidal wave, as he clung to the last shreds of his denial—but instead, he registered that the tidal wave had already come and gone, while he’d held on to his anger and betrayal, as he’d avoided her and sought oblivion in Nas’ arms.

That whole time, he’d been choking and gasping for air as the current had overtaken him. He’d been overwhelmed by how much he still loved Jane, blaming himself—and her—for how strong his urge to forgive her for everything was, even while he’d grieved for Taylor, and for Mayfair, and for the way Jane had chosen to put her trust in Oscar over him.

Now, Kurt understood better. He could admit that the core of his anger had been justified, but that he’d allowed his own love for her to amplify his feelings, turning the cold fury into a coping strategy for his own guilt at how she’d suffered because of his actions and assumptions.

He’d loved her since the day she’d beaten him in a race up seventy flights of stairs to save his sister—and teased him about it afterwards. It had just taken him a long time to accept that his instincts about her inner goodness had been right, even if so many other things had been wrong.

Now he was at peace with his feelings, even as he was terrified of losing everything by hoping for more than they had.

_I love you, Jane._

He wanted to lean over and kiss her awake—wanted it so much that he could practically feel her lips against his. Instead, he contented himself with brushing a tendril of hair back from her cheek, his touch so light that she didn’t stir.

Then, shutting down thoughts of tracing her neck tattoo with his fingertips, he looked past her, at the window. The light coming through the window still had a bluish, early morning tinge, which made him confident that there was still at least an hour left until his alarm went off.

Closing his eyes, he listened to the pattering rain and waited for sleep to claim him once more. He wasn’t getting out of bed a second earlier than he had to—not when this might be the only time he shared it with the woman he loved.

* * *

Jane had never felt so warm and safe as she’d woken up. What was different this morning?

She took a deep breath, and Kurt filled her senses—his arm around her, his scent and body heat surrounding her, his steady breaths tickling the back of her neck. He was completely relaxed, still sleeping, and she savoured each second of the realisation that this was really happening.

Too sleepy to tense up at the unusual situation, she mentally catalogued everything about it to store in her memories, knowing he’d apologise and roll away from her the moment he woke up. He was pressed right up against her back, and his fingers were splayed over her bare stomach, where her shirt had ridden up during the night. Unable to help herself, Jane gave a slight wriggle, and tingles spread across her skin as Kurt stirred, drawing in a slow, deep breath and positioning his hand a little more firmly against her abdomen.

Jane bit her lip, torn between two extremes. One part of her just wanted him to continue sleeping, so she could bask in this glorious, stolen moment of intimacy for as long as she could. The other part of her just…hurt.

_I want this for real. I want him to reach for me while he’s awake, to hold me close on purpose. To want me the way I want him. Knowing that things are too complicated between us, that he’d rather keep his distance…that’s just too painful._

_But maybe it isn’t as hopeless as it seemed before. He did say the other day that he was glad we’d been led to each other, and Kurt doesn’t say stuff like that to the rest of the team. Not even when he’s had a few beers._

_Maybe if I press back against him a little, or take his hand when he wakes up and tries to move away…_

She suppressed a sigh, remembering the last couple of times she’d hit on him out of the blue. The first time, she’d taken his hand and pressed it against her chest, and he’d practically run out of her safehouse, though she’d seen the conflicted desire in his eyes. The second time, when she’d kissed him outside his apartment block, he’d seemed as captivated by her as she was by him, sparking hope that they could be something more. But only a couple of days later, he’d talked himself out of it, apologising for standing her up at the park and backing off.

 _Just as well I wasn’t there, either. But I_ wanted _to be, and that’s the difference between us._

If she seduced him right now, he might be okay with it for a day or two, but then he’d talk himself out of it again. Jane didn’t think she could bear the pain of having everything she wanted, only to have him distance himself a third time.

But even as her mind was conflicted, her body knew just what it needed. _Special Agent Kurt Weller. Over me. Under me. Against me. Inside me. Any damn way I can have him._

_At least he seems to be deeply asleep. I don’t know if I could lie still if his morning wood were pressing against my ass._

_But it feels like there’s a fold of blanket between our lower bodies. Maybe he_ is _hard._

Heat built between her thighs, and she resisted the impulse to push her ass back against him. Purposely trying to provoke arousal in her sleeping friend—and boss—would be manipulative, not to mention morally wrong. No matter how much she wanted him, nor how much he seemed to return her feelings sometimes.

She took a shaky breath, then focused on calming her impulses, forcing her thoughts and senses to how comfortable and warm she was, rather than to imagined scenarios of what might happen if she let her instincts reign.

_Maybe I should roll away from him. Make sure this doesn’t get too embarrassing. Sure, it might wake him up, but it’s already light outside. It must be nearly time for the alarm to go off, right?_

_Do the right thing. Move away._

But her muscles wouldn’t obey the mental command, as though sensing that it wasn’t what she really wanted.

Jane gave up, allowing herself to be lulled by the sound of the rain outside. _I just want to pretend, just for a little while longer, that we—_

The loud chime of Kurt’s alarm startled her, chasing away whatever justification her mind was about to supply. The surge of adrenaline made her body jolt, and she rolled onto her front as Kurt shifted onto his back, a low groan escaping him as he reached out for his phone.

She rose up on her forearms, smothering a genuine yawn as her pulse began to calm. “Morning,” she murmured, turning her head towards his side of the bed.

“Morning.” He rubbed a hand across his eyes, dropping his now silent phone onto his chest. Then he gave her a sleepy smile that made her second-guess her decision to resist seducing him.

_He’s so handsome first thing in the morning. All scruffy and needing a shave, his guard down… Sweet, almost._

“How’d you sleep?” he asked, his voice a little gruffer than usual.

Jane realised she’d only woken once, when the storm had still been raging hard. She’d fallen asleep again not long after that. “Pretty well, actually. How about you?”

“Same here.” He stifled a yawn of his own. “Hasn’t made me into a morning person, though.”

Jane slid out of bed, glad to be able to avoid his gaze by turning her back to him. She was still more aroused than sleepy, and she wasn’t sure she could hide it. “If we hadn’t had to cut yesterday short, I’d say you should get another hour’s sleep, but unless you want to give us Monday _and_ Tuesday off…”

“I know. I’d be tempted to just say ‘screw it, we’ve earned the break’, but I don’t like being so far from New York when we don’t know why Shepherd was in Bangkok.” He sighed. “You go ahead and take the bathroom first. I promise not to doze off again.”

Jane grabbed her go bag and headed for the bathroom, trying the light switch with no real optimism that it would work. “Power’s still out. No big surprise there.”

Kurt grunted, and she snickered to herself at how weary he sounded. It was entirely possible she _would_ have to throw a pillow at him in a few minutes, the way he’d given her permission to last night.

Shutting herself into the windowless darkness for long enough to pee, she allowed herself a moment to acknowledge just how disappointed she was that the alarm had interrupted—even though it was for the best. Then she closed the door on her wishful thinking, determined not to make things awkward today.

She was halfway through applying her mascara—the bathroom door open now, to allow enough light to fall onto the mirror—when she realised Kurt had moved just as fast as she had at the sound of the alarm.

_He was awake, too? Does he know that I…?_

Of course he did. She’d jumped about a foot when the alarm had startled her—there was no way she’d have done that unless she’d been awake already. _Or maybe you didn’t jump as far as you think you did, and Kurt reacting the same way just made the movement seem bigger._

Should she apologise for not separating from him when she’d woken up, and say that she hadn’t wanted to risk disturbing him? Or would it be better to pretend it had never happened, unless he said something first?

_Just take your cue from Kurt. He could have moved just as easily as you could. Easier, because his arm was around you. He probably didn’t want to risk waking you. So if he apologises, then so can you. But otherwise…_

_No point in saying you’re sorry, because you’d be lying._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup, before anyone asks, there's going to have to be a second night with only one bed... However will they survive? :D


	5. All Booked Up

“So, I have some good news, and some bad news.” As they headed for the car, Kurt tossed the car keys across to Jane.

She caught them deftly, alert despite the early hour, and raised an eyebrow. “Is the good news that I’m driving?”

He grinned, anticipating what her predictable reaction would be. “No. That’s the bad news. The _good_ news is that I’m in charge of the music.”

Jane gave a good-natured groan. “Isn’t it a little _early_ for Johnny Cash?”

“No such thing.” He popped the trunk and slung his go bag inside, then reached over for hers. “How did I end up with a partner who doesn’t appreciate the Man in Black?”

She waited until they were both in the car to reply. “I told you before, it’s not like I hate him. I’ve just heard every single one of his songs a hundred times already, and I didn’t even know who he was when we first met.”

It was an exaggeration, but he was in a cheerful enough mood to let it slide. Hooking his phone up to the car’s sound system, he scrolled through his music collection. “I promised one album, right? I’ll even split it over two days.”

She gave him a quick smile, turning the keys in the ignition. “You can sneak a few more tracks in if I look like I’m falling asleep.”

He started with a classic— _Folsom Prison Blues_ —and relaxed back in his seat, humming along with a few bars. Jane pulled out of the parking space before glancing over. “You’re in a good mood this morning.”

_You could say that…_

His morning had started in a much more interesting way than he’d ever dreamed it would. He’d dozed off again after he’d first woken, and when he’d stirred awake again, he’d been stunned to find Jane spooned right up against him, sound asleep. He’d somehow managed to gather enough self-control to work a fold of the blanket between her tempting ass and his morning wood, but that had been his limit.

Unable to compel himself to draw away from her completely, he’d draped one arm around her—realising too late that her shirt was bunched up so his fingers brushed her bare abs—and just enjoyed holding her. Maybe he didn’t have the right, but he’d only meant for it to be for a minute. When she’d stirred awake, her breath had caught as she’d taken in the situation, and he’d been ready to apologise and move away—but then she’d melted back against him, her body language interrupting him more plainly than words ever could have.

He should have moved anyway. Consent was important to him, and he’d never have let things go any further without her clear, enthusiastic agreement. But for a second, she’d begun to press her ass back against his cock, before catching herself and becoming still again. Her breathing had trembled a little, and he’d felt his carefully corralled desire begin to break free in earnest. Only by focusing on his own breathing had he been able to remain motionless. Even so, his resolve had weakened fast. He’d just decided to throw caution to the wind and kiss the back of her neck, when his alarm tone had shattered the moment.

They’d both jolted out of the dreamlike embrace in the same instant, and if he hadn’t been so damn frustrated that he’d missed the opportunity, he would have burst into laughter. As it was, her poker face was damn near perfect, giving no sign that she’d been awake as she’d wished him good morning. He’d feigned early-morning lethargy, hiding his aching hard-on beneath the blanket and his emotions beneath a veneer of drowsy friendliness.

He might even have convinced her he really had been asleep, too—but when she’d finished with her makeup and ceded the bathroom to him, the furtive glance she’d shot his way told him she’d caught on. Not that she’d been trying to let him know she knew—it had been a very brief slip, one he wouldn’t have noticed if he hadn’t spent so much time analysing her behaviour this year—but now he was sure.

They’d been circling each other for months now, first with wariness, then with gradually more confidence, until something happened to make one or both of them drop back again. At the bar the other day, they’d almost broken through the barriers between them, and this morning had been an even closer moment. Kurt knew better than to try to predict the way things would happen between them by now, but if their usual pattern held, something would happen to distract one or both of them today.

And tonight, they’d be in separate rooms, wherever they ended up staying. He wasn’t selfish enough to try to pressure her—she wasn’t just a friend; he also held a huge amount of power over her at work, and that was an imbalance he refused to wield against her—so if she wanted to resume where they’d left off, she’d have to invite him into her room tonight. Into her bed.

If she did, he already knew what his answer would be. He just wished like hell he knew whether this was the right time—for either of them.

But he didn’t have it in him to refuse her again.

* * *

After lunch, Kurt wandered off over the parking lot to call Allie, while Jane cued up her playlist for the afternoon’s drive from the passenger seat of the car. When he slid behind the wheel, looking glad to be back in the drivers’ seat, she glanced over at him. “It’s a shame the case didn’t take us to Vegas or something. We could have driven back through Colorado, so you could stop and talk to Allie’s bump for a while.”

Kurt snorted. “Hey, you say that like I wouldn’t at least say hi to Allie first.”

Jane tried to keep a straight face. “I know you’d talk to her. But _first_?”

His smile became a heart-stopping grin, and Jane reached for the notebook where she’d written down their route the day before, hoping he was too distracted by starting the car to notice her appreciating him.

“Honestly, I’m gonna be over there bugging Allie enough, once my little girl is born. Best I leave her alone for now.”

Jane lost the battle for composure. “She yelled at you again, huh?”

“I wouldn’t say ‘yelled’. Complained a little, maybe.” He sighed, a little guilt creeping into his expression. “She didn’t sleep well because of the baby kicking around last night. She’d just started taking a nap when I called.”

“Hey, you’re not psychic. She just gave you a tough time because she’s tired. She’ll probably apologise later.”

He shrugged. “I know. And she has a point. She’s already taken a desk job, like I wanted for her while she’s pregnant. Having me hovering around when they’re both fine and there’s nothing I can do…that doesn’t help.”

Jane laid her hand on his arm for a second. “You’re just trying to be a responsible parent. You know what didn’t help with that? Allie moving two time zones away. So she’s gonna have to deal with your worrying, because you’re already dealing with her absence. If she doesn’t give you a break about calling her, you should tell her that.”

“Thank you.” He gave her a rueful glance. “It’ll be fine. Just needs some adjustment on both sides.”

Jane looked down at their route, a little uncomfortable. She had no issues with Allie, but since it was hard to know where she herself stood with Kurt these days, advising him on how to relate to the mother of his child felt as though Jane was pressing against a boundary somewhere.

She changed the subject. “So, two options. Are we still thinking South Bend, Indiana before we stop tonight, so we don’t actually have to take Monday off work? Or do we go more relaxed, and stop in Chicago tonight, Buffalo tomorrow night?”

Kurt tilted his head. “Either works. Let’s see how it plays out.”

“Works for me.” Jane leaned back in her seat.

He gave her a quick frown, pulling back onto I-94. “You sure? You’ve been looking a little penned in today.”

A little taken aback that he’d noticed, Jane took a moment to react. She’d been fidgeting all morning, wishing the rain hadn’t been so bad that she’d had to skip her morning run. “Oh, I… It’s not a huge deal. I’m just not used to so much sitting. Even with a full day of paperwork at the office, I still go for a run first thing in the morning, or hit the gym afterwards.”

He nodded slowly, processing that. “How does the weather look in Chicago later on? If we stop there, we could go running in Grant Park before it gets dark. And if you want to hit the art museums tomorrow, we could just fly back to New York tomorrow night instead of driving the rest of the way. The storm’s heading north now, anyway.”

 _Art museums…_ Jane’s interest was piqued, but then she shot Kurt a sceptical look. “Art museums don’t sound like your idea of a fun weekend activity.”

He gave an easy shrug. “No, but I could hit the aquarium while you were busy.”

Already excited about turning the rest of the weekend into a sightseeing trip, Jane searched the internet for information about the art museums’ current exhibitions. “When do _I_ get to see the aquarium, then?”

Kurt laughed. “Okay, so we both go to the aquarium, then you can go be cultured and I’ll find something else to do.”

“Are you sure?” she asked, hesitating. “If you’d rather keep driving...”

He shook his head. “No, we might as well have a little fun in a new place. New for you, anyway.”

“How many times have you been to Chicago before?”

He drummed his fingers against the wheel for a second. “This’ll be the fourth. I headed down a few times to watch the Cubs with an old Quantico buddy. He worked at the Chicago field office for a while.”

Sensing there was more to the story, Jane stayed quiet, waiting.

After a second, Kurt unclenched his jaw enough to speak. “He was taking kickbacks. We don’t talk anymore, but last I heard, he’d surrendered his badge.”

Jane winced, knowing how seriously Kurt took the integrity of the Bureau. “I’m sorry he wasn’t who you thought he was.”

He shook his head. “It happens.”

Before she could think too hard about the other people in his life who weren’t what he’d thought they were, he gestured to her phone. “So, does the weather look good for a run tonight?”

She ran a quick search before answering. “Actually, yeah. We might even get a little sunshine.”

The remaining tension drained from his demeanour. “Sounds like we have a plan, then.”

“Sounds like.” She smiled over at him. “Thanks, Kurt. This’ll be the first time I’ve played tourist, outside of New York State.”

“You’re welcome.” He glanced over his shoulder for theatrical effect. “Are there still M & Ms in that bag back there?”

She rolled her eyes, twisting her body and leaning into him as she reached for the bag. “With the amount of junk you’ve eaten already this weekend, I hope you’re coming on that run with me.”

“Hey, road trip food doesn’t have calories,” he told her, amused. “Anyway, I eat better than you do most of the time, Ms. I-Don’t-Cook.”

She smothered a laugh, digging out a handful of candy before relinquishing the bag to him. “Sometimes I make salads to go with my takeout. And now Roman lives with me, sometimes he cooks.”

“Uh-huh.”

They lapsed into silence for a while, before Jane thought to check the hotels in downtown Chicago and book rooms for them. There was no way this counted as something they could charge to the FBI’s expenses account, and she refused to let Kurt pay for her room tonight.

She was stunned when hotel after hotel’s online booking pages told her that there were no vacancies for that night. “I think we might have to ditch our plan.”

Kurt frowned over at her. “What’s up?”

“There’s some kind of comic book convention in Chicago this weekend. None of the hotels I’ve checked so far have vacancies; everything’s fully booked up.”

He sighed. “Keep looking, just in case. We might get lucky.”

Jane fought her disappointment as she continued her search. “Well, unless you want roaches in the bathtub and rats under the bed, this is the last place I can check that’s reasonably priced…”

A few seconds later, she stared down at the result of her query, her pulse skipping.

“There’s one,” she said hesitantly. “But…only if you don’t mind sharing a bed again tonight.”

Kurt was quiet for a moment. “The way you just said that, I should be asking if _you_ mind.” His voice held the barest hint of a question.

“No, I—” She stared out of the window, her face heating. “Last night was different; we didn’t have a choice. I just don’t want to assume, that’s all.”

“If you’re comfortable with it, then so am I. But, Jane?”

She looked over at him, and he took his eyes off the road to meet hers, his expression serious.

“ _Only_ if you are,” he finished softly, holding her gaze for a moment more before turning his attention back to the empty road.

Jane nodded, looking down at her screen again as her stomach fluttered a little. “Then I’ll book it.”

They were quiet again as she entered her details and clicked through to the confirmation screen. After she was sure their room was reserved, she let her phone fall into her lap, the screen going dark.

If there was ever a time to bring up their closeness this morning, it was now—to make sure the air was clear, that their expectations were aligned. _Before_ they shared their second bed in two nights. But she didn’t know where to start.

“Jane?”

“Hmm?” She looked over to find a small smile on his face, though his eyes were on the road.

“If you want to snuggle up to me again tomorrow morning, just try not to wake me before eight.”

The words were so unexpected that all she could do for a moment was stare. Then she saw the funny side, laughing softly as she brushed her hair back behind her ear. “Whatever. You were the one with your arm around me, Weller.”

“It was comfortable. And for the record, you were right there when I woke up, so…”

She bit her lip. “If I moved in my sleep, I can’t be held responsible.”

He inclined his head, conceding her point.

Feeling mischievous—and also testing him a little—Jane added, “If it makes you feel better, we can put a few pillows between us before we go to sleep. Then you’ll have plenty of space.”

“No, the _pillows_ will have plenty of space, and we’ll be hanging off the edges of the bed. No deal.”

“Well, just remember that I offered,” Jane said.

“Offer acknowledged…and declined.”


	6. Imaginations Running Wild

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're the kind of reader who hates it when two idiots are idiots about their obvious feelings for many, many chapters on end, this fic is probably starting to make you throw things at the screen by now. But since that's what you guys signed up for, you're just gonna have to deal with it. :D I have no remorse.
> 
> And thank you to the people who listened to me ponder my direction for this chapter on the internets - I can't even remember if it was Tumblr, Discord or WhatsApp now, but anyway, you guys know who you are. Thank you again!

The hotel room in Chicago was more spacious than the motel room—large enough to contain a small table as well as a bed. Why did that disappoint Jane? She could sketch at the table tonight, which was way more practical.

 _You know why. You wanted to spend the evening close enough to reach out and touch Kurt—even if there’d be no reason to_ actually _touch him._

Jane shook the thought out of her head and pulled her workout gear from the bottom of her go bag.

“Earlier, you said _we_ could go for a run in Grant Park. You still want to come along?” she asked.

Kurt looked over from where he was stashing his toiletries in the bathroom. “Thought about it…but nope.”

Unsure whether she was relieved or disappointed, she frowned across at him. “How come?”

He returned to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed. “Well, unlike some people, I treat being out of state for a few days as an excuse to skip my usual exercise routine. I didn’t bring anything to work out in.”

“What about the sweatpants you were wearing last night?” Jane suggested, without thinking it through first.

Amused, he raised an eyebrow. “And after I’ve sweated through them trying to keep up with you, what would I wear to sleep in tonight?”

“Ah.” Flustered, Jane looked down at the clothing in her hands. “Good point.”

“I still have a book to finish, so you can run for as long as you need.” He kicked off his shoes and began to get settled on the bed.

Jane shut herself into the bathroom to get changed, taking a quick look in the mirror to make sure she wasn’t visibly blushing.

The idea of Kurt sleeping naked next to her wouldn’t disappear from her head, even as she left the hotel room with a brief farewell over her shoulder. Beginning a warm-up jog in the direction of the lakeshore, she assessed her surroundings, trying to focus on reality and not the fantasy in her head.

Even so, as she reached the wide open space of Grant Park and began some stretches, her mind lingered on Kurt. The way he’d addressed the moments when they’d lain spooned together that morning had thrown her off guard, but also given her the wild hope that it would happen again tomorrow morning.

And that the alarm wouldn’t interrupt them this time.

And that innocent snuggling would lead to less chaste activities.

She straightened from stretching her hamstrings, sighing. _Time to outrun that idea, Doe._

Why couldn’t she shake this stupid crush? Was it just because Kurt had been the first person to give her reassurance, back when she’d first arrived at the FBI? The first person she remembered hugging her? Had she imprinted on him like baby birds did to the farmers who hand-reared them?

It felt like more than that, but how could she know? A few hazy memories of her life with Oscar, back when she’d been Remi, didn’t give her enough of the picture to remember what it had been like to be in love. And their relationship after he’d rescued her from Carter’s clutches had been hollow, unequal—him holding tidbits of information just out of her reach, expecting her to jump through his hoops to get to the truth. She’d grown to rely on him nonetheless, even to panic at the prospect of him being replaced with a different handler—but she’d always felt there was something missing, something besides the respect he’d clearly never had for her as Jane Doe.

With Kurt, the only thing she felt was missing was his touch, his body against hers, his lips on her skin…

And that was a thought she _definitely_ had to outrun, or she’d wind up jumping him the moment she got back to the hotel room.

She started at a brisk jog, then increased her pace to an all-out run as the endorphins kicked in. Exercise seemed to be a chore for most people, but she didn’t know who she’d be without it—the repetitive impact of her feet against the ground, the breeze in her hair, the burn of lactic acid in her muscles when she reached her limit. Unless she was injured in some way, she fitted in at least a small workout every day, taking comfort in the way her body rarely let her down the way her mind did.

Maybe Remi had been an exercise addict, and that physical dependency on endorphins had transferred over to her, post-ZIP. The way Kurt had been able to tell she was suffering without her morning run— _quit thinking about Kurt—_ seemed to imply she was a little too reliant on exercise, but until they’d dealt with Shepherd, Jane needed every edge her body could give her.

Until Sandstorm were no longer a threat, Kurt could tease her about her love of exercise all he wanted.

Her brain supplied an image of him sliding his fingertips under the hem of her shirt, kissing the back of her neck, and Jane swallowed hard. _Not_ that _kind of teasing, Doe._

The shower she took when she got back to the hotel would have to be very, _very_ cold.

* * *

Concentrating on his book was impossible.

Kurt threw his phone aside and scowled at the wall, shaking his head. _Should have flown back to New York with Zapata._

The moment he registered the thought, he was already laughing at himself. He already knew he was exactly where he wanted to be, even if it was driving him crazy. He could never get enough of each soft, shy smile Jane sent his way, or the lightness in his heart when he could make her laugh.

Spending this time with her, alone, away from work, was a gift and a curse at the same time. It was making him realise how effortless their friendship had become over the past few months, despite all the odds. But it was also shaking his resolve to remain at a distance until her case was concluded.

Earlier, when they’d discussed sharing a hotel room again, the awkwardness between them had been tangible, and he’d sensed that if he didn’t address the issue they’d both been pretending to ignore, things would only get worse. So he’d turned it into a joke, teasing that if she wanted to snuggle up to him again tomorrow morning, she should try not to wake him. She’d been startled, but the anxiety she’d been radiating had diminished rapidly after that, as she’d taken the chance to make sure he knew she hadn’t cosied up to him on purpose.

At least, not _before_ she’d woken up with his arm around her. Whether she wanted him to know it or not, she’d definitely been happy to stay there, once she’d realised her predicament.

He was torn about how to handle things from here. Part of him wanted to end the pretence that he could ever see her as just a friend, take her out to dinner somewhere nice, give her the kind of romantic evening she deserved, then let her decide where she wanted to go from there.

But the problems with that scenario jumped out at him the moment he considered it. For one thing, they were both living out of their go bags this weekend, and he was willing to bet Jane’s didn’t contain anything she could wear for a date, any more than his did.

The biggest problem, though, was that if they agreed to change the rules of their relationship at this point, the bed they’d be sharing tonight would go from a suggestive inconvenience to an expectation. At home, a date that ended with a kiss could be ended with a ‘see you tomorrow’ and a retreat into their own separate spaces, if they wanted to keep things slow. Here in Chicago, they couldn’t even rent a separate room for one of them to sleep in if they wanted to—everything was booked solid tonight.

The last thing Kurt wanted was for Jane to feel pressured to sleep with him, if she needed time to figure things out.

That left only one course of action, which should have made everything easier, but really did nothing but keep them in this holding pattern. He was going to have to ignore his feelings for Jane for a little longer, despite how impossible that was becoming. Once they got back to New York and fell back into their usual working routine, he would reassess where they stood, and whether it would be easier to stay friends when they weren’t spending their nights in the same bed.

He suspected there was no going back for him—not now he’d gazed into Jane’s sleeping face and admitted to himself that he was hopelessly in love with her.

But at least he could spend a night or two more in denial.

Glancing at his watch, Kurt decided to shower and trim back his stubble while he was failing to concentrate on anything else. His thoughts stayed on Jane as he freshened up—and if he lingered in the shower for a few minutes longer than usual, that was between him and his hand.

Once he was finished taming his stubble, he returned his attention to the book he’d been failing to read earlier. Now he was a little more relaxed, he actually managed to absorb a couple of pages before Jane returned to the hotel room.

As she opened the door, he heard her speaking, obviously not to him. “Are you sure you don’t want me to fly back tonight? I can probably be home by ten or eleven, if—”

She walked into view with her phone pressed to her ear, sending a quick smile in his direction before becoming distracted again. “Okay, but call me if you need to. Don’t suffer alone. I bet Dr. Sun would say the same thing.”

 _Roman._ Kurt had already suspected—her brother was the only one Jane would drop everything for when there were several states between them—but he relaxed a little nonetheless. _Come on, Weller. Were you actually worried Oliver Kind had changed his mind about leaving her?_

Apparently, he was—even if he hadn’t realised it until now.

A minute of quiet conversation later, Jane hung up and turned to Kurt with an apologetic sigh. “Sorry. Roman had a tough therapy session today. A couple more memories came back, from when we were kids. Nothing we can use against Shepherd, but…he’s struggling.”

Concerned, Kurt sat up straighter. “Does Dr. Sun know how bad things are?”

Jane gave a helpless shrug. “I think so, but…he’s not her biggest fan, so he could have played it down, even though she _is_ his therapist.” She shifted her weight, indecisive. “I know how much I would hate it if I said I was fine and everyone ignored me, but…I’m worried, Kurt. He still looks so fragile sometimes.”

“Hey.” He caught her wrist as she paced up between his side of the bed and the bathroom door, drawing her gently closer and bringing her to a stop between his knees. It was far too intimate a position for a couple of friends, but he’d acted before he could stop himself, and Jane was probably too distracted to notice. “He’s gonna be fine. But if it’ll make you feel better, we could see if Patterson’s free to go check on him.”

She bit her lip for a moment, gazing down at him with a conflicted look in her eyes. “From what I’ve seen of them in the lab together, they do seem to get on. He doesn’t remember anything about what the tattoos mean, but they were trying to figure one of them out together last week, in the lab. It was nice to see him connect with someone new.” She nodded slowly. “Do you think Patterson would mind?”

“Between you and me, since the whole Borden mess, she’s been working _way_ too hard. I bet she’d be pulling overtime in the lab again tonight—against my orders, I should add—so I think it’d be good for her to have something else to do.” He shrugged. “If she has other plans, she can say no. But she won’t mind us asking.”

“Okay.” Jane relaxed a little, and he rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand, hoping to reassure her. “Thank you. I was freaking out a little.”

He resisted the urge to cup her waist in his hands, squeezing her hand before releasing it. “I’ll send her a text.”

“And I’ll take a quick shower.” Jane stepped back, looking slightly self-conscious now. “Then maybe we can go for a walk, find somewhere to grab some food?”

“Sounds good.” _Anything that will distract me from doing something stupid, like nearly pulling you into my lap again._

While Jane located her toiletries and a change of clothing, Kurt busied himself with his phone, not daring to look up in case she saw how close his control had been to slipping. It hadn’t even been a conscious decision to pull her that close; it had just been instinct, as though his body already knew he was waiting for the right moment to change things between them, and had taken a step further towards intimacy without his volition.

Now he couldn’t stop wondering what might have happened if he’d laid a trail of kisses below her sports bra, across her bare stomach.

_Wonder when you get home. Focus on texting Patterson._

By the time Jane emerged from the bathroom, their friend had agreed to stop by Jane and Roman’s safehouse later that evening. Relieved, Jane called Patterson to thank her, then turned to Kurt.

“Now, do I call Roman and tell him Patterson’s gonna be dropping by, or do I just let her surprise him?”

He reached for his shoes, amused by her indecision. “I don’t know. Do you outright want to _tell_ him Big Sis arranged a babysitter, or just have him put that together on his own when Patterson shows up?”

She sighed, looking rueful. “Either way is pretty controlling, huh?”

Kurt pulled on his shoes, then got to his feet. “Honestly? I’d have done the same thing if Sarah was in his position. Things aren’t easy for him at the moment, and it’s better to be a little too cautious than to regret it later.”

Jane nodded, taking a step closer and gazing up at him with gratitude, and an intensity that felt so damn familiar that his breath caught. “Thank you. For…” She shook her head a little shyly. “For being here. For not making me feel like I’m overreacting.”

“You’re welcome.” Before the moment could grow into something deeper than either of them could handle, Kurt nodded towards the door. “Come on, let’s move.”

She shot him an amused look over her shoulder, halfway to the door. “‘Let’s move’? That was very Special Agent Weller. Is this an important mission?”

“It’s a food-finding mission. The most important kind.”

Jane laughed under her breath. “Sounds dangerous. Maybe I should bring my sidearm with me.”

“Nah. We can improvise if we have to.”

It wasn’t until they were almost out on the street that he realised why the intense moment when she’d thanked him had seemed so familiar.

_You’re my starting point._

It didn’t change anything, he told himself, as they began a relaxed walk down towards Lake Michigan. No matter how charged things got between them tonight, acting on his desires was out of the question. Not while Jane had no choice but to share his bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is getting the impression that Jane might have decided to change course a little while she was in the shower, you might be right... Even with worrying about her brother factored in, she just can't stay completely oblivious to Kurt's heart-eyes. But since Kurt has already drawn a line under tonight as Not Going to Happen...things will likely get even more frustrating before bedtime. ;D


	7. Impromptu Anniversary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who's still excited about this fic! I can't believe it's getting as long as it is - but at the same time, this is me, so I don't know what I expected. Anyway, because this fic doesn't have enough tropes in it, I'll add another one. Time for some fake dating! Even if this is a little more devious and dishonest than canon Jeller probably would be (outside of a life-or-death situation, I mean).

“Sawyer would love this stuff.” Kurt gestured to a group of laughing young people in outrageous costumes, heading in the opposite direction across the street. “I see at least two characters from his favourite show, in that group alone.”

Jane smiled, thinking of his tousle-headed nephew. She hadn’t seen either Sawyer or Sarah since they’d moved to Portland, and that had been before she’d been black sited. “How _is_ Sawyer?”

“I spoke to him last week. Sarah finally got around to setting up a video chat. He’s good. Growing up a little faster these days.”

“I guess when you’re that age, everything changes so fast.” She looked over at Kurt. “How about Sarah?”

He shrugged. “Portland makes her happy, I think. New boyfriend, a good job—things seem to be working out for her over there.”

“I’m glad.” As they passed yet another restaurant with a line of convention-goers stretching out onto the street, Jane shook her head. “Are you getting the feeling the food situation will be a lot like the hotel room situation, or is it just me?”

“Maybe. Let’s head a little further up this way, see what we find.”

As they walked, Jane once more thought back over what had happened in the hotel room. She’d been close to packing up and going home tonight, worried about Roman, when Kurt had taken her hand, pulling her to stand between his knees as he’d suggested getting Patterson to look in on Roman instead. The warmth and concern in his eyes had calmed her, but also distracted her from imagining worst-case scenarios—as had the intimate way they’d been positioned.

She could have just climbed into his lap right there, and kissed him until they were both breathless. She’d taken refuge in the bathroom before her urge to do just that had overridden everything else.

While she’d showered off the sweat from her run, she’d realised just how difficult the rest of the night would be, if Patterson was successful at dispelling her worries about her brother. The more time Jane spent with Kurt, the harder she fell for him, and those feelings had never gone away, not even when their relationship had been at its most complicated.

This weekend, things seemed to have become simpler than they had in months. It was obvious Kurt still felt something for her. They were both single, attracted to each other…and even though she feared romance would destroy the strong friendship they’d forged this year, Patterson’s words about David had come back to her—the same ones that had spurred her to kiss Kurt for the first time.

Shepherd was still planning something monstrous, and she could decide they were too much of a liability to live, at any time.

Jane could lose Kurt before either of them felt ready to give it another try. All it would take would be one lucky shot.

Maybe if they just took this one night, made it whatever they wanted it to be…then they could leave whatever happened here in Chicago behind them when they left, if things got too messy.

It wasn’t what Jane wanted to happen, but if the awkwardness overwhelmed them the next day, and it was the only way to save their friendship...

Her thoughts had been confined to ‘what if’ while she’d been showering, but when Kurt had been able to calm her fears about Roman without making her feel like she was being hysterical, she couldn’t help but take a first, tiny step towards letting her guard down. She’d stepped in close, thanking him for being there for her, without trying to hide the depths of her feelings for him.

He’d distracted her with the reminder that they had to go find something to eat, but she’d seen the flash of desire in his eyes. Only the knowledge that they really would need food soon had stopped her from kissing him.

Now, as they walked, she let the back of her hand brush Kurt’s, hoping he would take her cue and lace his fingers through hers. He either didn’t notice, or didn’t pick up on her suggestion, and disappointment crept into her mind. Maybe this was more one-sided than she’d thought, and Kurt would rather not go there again.

The last thing she wanted was to become the creepy friend who couldn’t get over the times they’d kissed in the past. But somehow, despite her self-doubt, she couldn’t quite believe that was the case.

They wound up on the edge of the park, looking down towards the lakeshore, just as sunset bathed the sky in an orange glow.

“This is beautiful,” she said, half to herself. “Almost wish I had my sketchbook. Do you mind if I take a quick picture? Maybe I can draw it later.”

“Sure. Take as long as you need.” Kurt leaned against the rail in front of them, and from her peripheral vision, she could tell he was watching her, but she was too self-conscious to return his gaze.

It was one thing to decide to seduce the man you wanted, and another thing entirely to put aside all the memories of how much it hurt to be distant from him. The idea of taking a leap of faith and being rebuffed was terrifying. Kurt was one of the few people she could count on, and it had taken so long for them to build back up to this level of friendship.

Strange, how she could dive through a plate of glass to drop, roll and tackle a terrorist fifteen feet below her, without hesitating for more than a split-second—but the idea of offering her heart to Kurt for a third time made her feel like she was standing on the edge of a precipitous drop, afflicted by vertigo. Her earlier confidence was gone, replaced by a fluttering stomach and a pounding heart.

_More than anything, I’m scared of losing him. Losing the closeness that we had last night, when we were lying in bed talking about pillow fights, of all things. We weren’t even touching then, but at the same time…we almost were. Just not physically. And that’s what I’m scared to lose._

_Does that make me a coward?_

She took a couple of pictures of the view with her phone, concentrating on the skyline in order to return to the present, then asked, “Which way do you want to go now?”

After a moment’s indecision, they headed in the opposite direction to the convention centre, hoping there would be fewer hungry tourists that way.

“You okay?” Kurt asked, obviously picking up on the way her confidence had fallen.

She smiled and shrugged, playing it down. “Yeah—just hungry, I guess.”

He grimaced. “Yeah, me too. Even the takeout places are crammed full. So either we drive somewhere a little less central and try there…or we wait an hour or two for things to get less crazy.”

Jane glanced through the window of a restaurant as they passed, one of the few that wasn’t crammed with convention-goers. Registering that it was geared towards couples, most of its tables seating only two people, she sighed. “I’m hungry enough to suggest going ‘undercover’ as a couple again, but everyone else in there is dressed way better than we are.”

Kurt nodded ruefully. “The thought had crossed my mind. They wouldn’t even let us through the door in jeans…”

_Unless…_

The idea that formed in Jane’s head was a little ridiculous, but it might work, if they got lucky. She slowed her pace, thinking it through.

Realising he was leaving her behind, Kurt dropped back to her side with a frown. “What?”

“I’m coming up with a plan.” The moment she’d had the thought about being undercover with Kurt again, her romance-preoccupied mind had leapt upon it, despite her logical side doing the equivalent of rolling its eyes and sighing. “The odds of success are only about forty percent, and it would need us to tell some outrageous lies and add a little PDA, but if it works, we could be eating steak inside thirty minutes.”

He gazed at her, a gleam in his eyes that she couldn’t quite interpret. Knowing Kurt, the word ‘steak’ had overruled everything else. “You really think you can get them to let us eat there, in what we’re wearing? This, I have to see.”

“Like I said, it’s sixty-forty that we _won’t_ be able to make it work. My tattoos are gonna work against us as much as the dress code will. But it’s worth a try. You in?”

For a moment, she thought he’d back off, but then he offered her his arm with an intrigued smile. “So am I your husband again tonight?”

Ignoring the butterflies in her stomach as she leaned in to his side, Jane held up her free hand. “No rings, so I guess not. But we’ve been together as a couple four years, and tonight is our anniversary.”

He cocked his head to the side in acknowledgment. ”Happy anniversary, honey.”

“Thank you, darling.” As they reached the restaurant door, she wiped the smile off her face. “You’re disappointed and a little stressed out. You’ll get the rest as we go along.”

“Got it.” Just like that, the amusement was gone from his face, replaced by the emotions she’d described. If she hadn’t known him so well, she’d have believed his act completely.

The stakes of this ‘mission’ were low, and Jane was pretty sure they’d fail, but she couldn’t help but become a little more tense as they entered the restaurant. It smelled delicious inside, and she was getting hungrier by the second—not to mention, she wanted to spend as long as possible playing this role as Kurt’s girlfriend.

A server came forward, an apologetic look on her face. “I’m sorry, but the restaurant does have a dress-code—”

Jane put on an air of distress, slumping her shoulders as she glanced up at Kurt, then back at the server. “I know, that’s what I was afraid of, but I just… We’re having the worst time finding somewhere else to eat, with the convention and all, and it’s our anniversary—”

Sympathetically, the server shook her head. “I’m so sorry, but our dress code is pretty strict, for the sake of the other patrons, you know?”

“Isn’t there a table out of the way you can put us? Somewhere away from everyone else?” Jane massaged her temple to imply a tension headache, feigning stress. “We have formal outfits in our luggage, but our luggage is still in New York, and they can’t even locate it, let alone send it on. God knows where it is.”

Kurt rubbed her back soothingly, speaking to the server. “There’s no way you could make an exception, just this once? We booked this anniversary trip back to Chicago months ago. It’s where we first met. We had no idea everything would be so chaotic this weekend, and with our bags going missing, things are all going to hell.”

“Please?” Jane asked, putting a plaintive note into her voice.

The server wavered, glancing behind her. “Let me just go have a word with the owner. This isn’t really a decision I can make on my own.”

“Of course,” Jane said, and turned into Kurt’s loose embrace as they were left at the entrance.

He pressed a light kiss to the top of her head and murmured, “So traumatic, to have our perfect anniversary ruined by airline incompetence and flocks of comic book nerds. I might need therapy.”

Jane frowned up at him to hide the urge to laugh. “Do you want the steak, or not?”

Kurt gazed down at her with a softly loving expression that made Jane want to weep with jealousy towards the fictional character she was playing. “More than that, I just want to give my girlfriend the anniversary dinner she deserves.”

“Well, if the FBI doesn’t work out, I’m pretty sure you could win a few Oscars down in Hollywood…”

Fighting sudden, irrational irritability— _where the hell did he learn to act so well?_ —Jane turned to watch the server return with an older blonde woman in tow.

“I’m the restaurant owner, Beverly Harrison. Tara has just filled me in on your situation.”

Jane gave her the most pleading, ‘nothing about this situation is life-or-death, but I’m going to act like the world is ending anyway’ look she could manage. “Is there any way you could consider bending the rules, just this once? If the restaurant was fully booked, I wouldn’t even want to ask, but since there are a few free tables…”

Despite the fact that the owner didn’t look unsympathetic, Jane sensed they were out of luck—but as Beverly drew a breath to speak, Kurt pulled out the big guns.

“The thing is—I know you don’t think you’re far enough along to worry about it, baby, but I do—we just found out my girlfriend is pregnant.” Kurt slid a protective hand over her abdomen for emphasis, while Jane sighed, taking his cue that she thought he was overreacting. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for her to be skipping meals, in case it harms the baby. If it was just that we didn’t have our luggage, or that we didn’t want to wait two hours in line for a place in a less classy restaurant, I’d just say we should grab some junk food from a corner store and take it back to the hotel, even though it’s our anniversary. But this is our first baby, and I really don’t want to take any chances, you know?”

Swayed by his apologetic tone and the existence of the imaginary pregnancy, the owner glanced over at Tara, the server. “Just this once, and only because there’s a baby to think of.”

Kurt and Jane reacted with over-exaggerated relief, thanking her profusely. Jane let herself snuggle against Kurt for a few moments, knowing as she did so that she was just taking advantage of the situation to be close to him. For his part, Kurt tightened his arm around her, his lips grazing her brow for a second.

“Seat them at the back, and if other customers come in asking for the same, tell them this is an extenuating circumstance,” Beverly instructed, then touched Jane lightly on the shoulder, her eyes becoming warmer. “Congratulations on the pregnancy. You should listen to your boyfriend—taking good care of _yourself_ is how you take good care of the baby, at this stage.”

Jane nodded, putting embarrassed resignation into her voice. “I know. I guess I just haven’t even fully accepted that it’s happening yet.”

“Oh, you’ll get there. Enjoy your meal, you two.” With a smile, the owner retreated back through the restaurant, leaving Kurt and Jane to be seated by Tara.

Conscious of her ‘pregnancy’, Jane rejected the wine list, but indicated to Kurt that he should take a look. He decided to stick to water along with her, probably guessing she’d give him hell later for drinking, when he’d fabricated a baby that would stop her from doing the same.

Once they were left alone with their menus, Kurt looked up with a grin. “I actually feel a little guilty now.”

“On the one hand, I get that. On the other hand, they have free tables, we have money, but they were going to kick us out just because we were wearing casual clothing, so…” She shrugged.

“You have a point.” He studied the menu for a second, then glanced up again, humour in his eyes. “Sorry I made you pregnant, by the way.”

She couldn’t help but laugh. “Is that what you said to Allie?”

He snorted, looking a little embarrassed. “What I first said to Allie…contained a few more expletives. Aimed at the situation, not at her, I should add.” Before Jane could figure out how to respond, he continued, “Anyway, since it’s my fault you can’t have any wine, or any rare meat, I figured I should apologise.”

Jane opened her mouth to respond, but changed tack when she noticed an altercation going on towards the front of the restaurant. “Looks like it’s not just the restaurant owner who hates jeans. I think we’re gonna be attracting enough attention through the whole meal that we can’t drop the romance act now.”

Kurt glanced over at the patrons she’d indicated—who seemed to be put out that an exception ot the dress code had been made—then reached across the table to take Jane’s hand. “Well, my love, it _is_ our anniversary.”

Why did she want so desperately to buy into that affection in his eyes, so much more intense and genuine-looking than their act required?

She was out of her depth, but there was no point lamenting that now.

“We got what we wanted. We should celebrate,” she said, lifting her water glass to imply a toast.

Kurt’s attention drifted behind her for a split-second, making it a good bet that their server was returning. “To us,” he said simply, lifting his own glass.

“To us,” Jane echoed, unable to tear her gaze from his as she sipped her water.

It could easily have meant their friendship, their work partnership, their successful bid to be allowed to eat here…but in that moment, it seemed like so much more.


	8. Alternate Realities

“How’s the food?”

In retrospect, the fake pregnancy hadn’t been the best idea—though without it, they might not even be sitting here at all. Jane had taken the dietary restrictions and lack of alcohol in stride, but Kurt couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. His lie had no consequences for him, but plenty for her.

Jane’s mock glare told him she knew exactly where his mind was. “It’s not steak, but it’s good.”

“You _could_ still have had steak,” he pointed out, already knowing what her answer would be.

“Sure, if I wanted it charred to ashes first.” She ate another mouthful of risotto, her eyes amused, then added, “Really, Kurt, it’s fine. It’s still great food, and if you hadn’t said it, we wouldn’t be eating here at all. Save your guilt for the woman who’s had to deal with this stuff for months, already.”

The gentle teasing made him smile wryly. “In Allie’s case, I never know if I should be apologising, or just telling her it won’t be for much longer. In this case, though, the blame is all mine. I really am sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Jane sipped her water, her eyes on him, then added nonchalantly, “Though I do feel a _little_ sorry for myself. You got me fake-pregnant, and I don’t even remember the fun part.”

Kurt had been cutting into his steak, but at her words he faltered in the task, staring at her across the table as his mind struggled to catch up.

It would be so damn easy to take that train of thought and run with it into outright flirtation, to tell her that pregnancy was off the table, but if his imaginary performance wasn’t enough, he could prove that together, they’d be anything but forgettable.

But he’d promised himself he wouldn’t make a move while Jane had no choice but to sleep beside him.

_Don’t go there._

Banishing provocative images from his mind, he answered honestly, “I don’t even know how I’m supposed to respond to that.”

Jane shrugged, the glance she shot him semi-flirtatious, before she focused on her meal again. “However you want. By the way, they’re staring again.”

The couple at the table nearest to them—still a fair distance away, since they were so far from the other diners—hadn’t stopped giving them the evil eye since they’d been seated. He and Jane hadn’t been able to drop the act of being lovers for more than a couple of seconds—and that really wasn’t helping Kurt to remember that they were just friends.

He glanced over, and the couple glared, before making a show of returning their attention to their meals. Suppressing the urge to roll his eyes, he looked back at Jane. “Maybe we should get our stories straight—come up with a dating history, in case they come over and start interrogating us,” he said.

_Anything to change the subject from the imaginary sex we didn’t have._

Amusement flashed through Jane’s expression. “Where do you think we met?”

Kurt chose the furthest option from the truth he could, to make sure they kept in fictional territory. “At college.”

Jane hadn’t been to college—Remi had gravitated towards the military straight out of high school, if Shepherd and Roman were telling the truth—so she latched onto the idea with enthusiasm. “Okay, what was my major?”

He thought about it for a couple of seconds, wanting to make her smile without deviating too far from reality. “Art history. With a minor in ass-kicking.”

“I didn’t realise that was a qualification.” She gave him the stunning smile he’d been craving, and his pulse skipped in response.

“All the colleges in Illinois offer that program,” he said, deadpan. “How about me—what did I study?”

Jane knew he’d actually studied criminology at the University of Pennsylvania, while he’d waited to be old enough for Quantico. Shepherd had probably paid his school tuition, too, or at least pulled strings to get him his scholarship there, but Kurt refused to think about that tonight.

Instead of going with reality, Jane laughed. “You studied the culinary arts, with a minor in explosives.”

_God, I love this woman._

“Let’s not mention the one time the two mixed, and I almost got kicked out of college,” he added, running with her story.

Jane snorted. “Sounds more plausible than most people would think.” Then she frowned. “Wait, this is our four-year anniversary, and we met at college? Unless we’re at least a decade younger than we seem, the math isn’t adding up, here.”

He waved a hand dismissively. “We time travelled after college. Patterson invented a time machine.”

“Yeah? And how did we meet Patterson?” Jane’s eyes shone with laughter.

“She was at college with us. Reade and Zapata, too.”

“Sounds about as plausible as how we actually met, so I’m not gonna argue.” Jane finished her meal and laid down her utensils, then leaned back in her chair with a satisfied sigh. “Wow. I’m pretty full, but if you want dessert, I could probably be persuaded.”

_Depends if you want to skip dessert…_

Kurt bit his tongue before he could make the suggestive comment. “Well, you know I never turn down chocolate.”

“I’d noticed.” She rolled her eyes. “I wonder how many of the desserts the server will tell me I’m not allowed to eat.”

Before he could stop himself, Kurt let his heart do the talking. “Okay, since it’s my fault you’re being restricted tonight, how about this? When we get back to New York, as long as there’s no big crisis to manage, I’ll take you to dinner. You can eat and drink everything you want. My treat.”

_And it’s up to you whether you want to take this as a friendly offer, or something more._

Jane regarded him quietly for a couple of seconds, as though she was absorbing the implications of his words. Despite the relaxed atmosphere between them, the moment seemed to have a gravity to it that overrode everything else. There was no ambiguity about the way she was looking at him—she understood exactly what he was offering.

His pulse raced, though he remained outwardly calm. Rejection would hurt like hell, but he couldn’t take the words back now. He didn’t even want to.

“Deal,” she said.

Relief drained some of the tension from his muscles, and he knew he was smiling like an idiot, but he didn’t care.

The warmth in her gaze made him long to drag her back to the hotel room and into their shared bed, to get an ‘early night’ that kept them awake until dawn.

He dismissed the thought, but couldn’t help an inner sense of jubilation. As long as they had this understanding, even if it took a while to find the time to fit in a date, no one else would come between them. Jane knew he was waiting. She’d wait for him, in return.

And god, she was worth waiting for.

* * *

“Feel like walking down to the lake before we head back to the room?” Evidently, Kurt was feeling as restless as she was.

Jane nodded, pocketing her phone again as they changed direction. “Sorry. Just got another text from Patterson.”

Kurt glanced over, concerned. “Everything okay with Roman?”

“Yeah. She says they’re doing great, actually. She took some board game over there, and now he’s challenged her to a mancala match, so things could be getting competitive over there.”

Kurt smiled. “They have more in common than just the puzzles, huh?”

“Seems like it.”

“Must be a weight off your mind, knowing he’s coping tonight.” In his quiet words, Jane sensed an offer to listen if she wanted to open up more about her worries and fears.

She considered it for a few moments as they walked, but even though there were so many things she fretted about when it came to Roman, tonight didn’t seem like the time to vent about it. Roman had insisted he was fine. Patterson had said they were having fun. And Jane…

Jane couldn’t find it in her to worry much about anything while Kurt was walking along beside her, relaxed and attentive, his presence making her fears seem far away. Ever since he’d offered to take her on a date when they got home, she’d been wondering if she’d fallen asleep in the car on the way to Chicago, and she’d been dreaming everything since.

He wanted to try again. Even if he was still giving her mixed signals tonight, that was more than she’d ever dared to hope for.

“Jane?”

She realised she’d fallen silent and shot an apologetic look Kurt’s way. “Sorry. I guess I’m kind of processing a few things at once.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

_I’m wondering why we’re going on a date at some undefined point in the future, but you don’t even want to hold my hand tonight._

“I’m just thinking back over everything that’s happened lately. Things never get predictable, that’s for sure.”

He nodded, a wry smile crossing his face. “Think we’re in the wrong line of work for that.”

“I think I’m in the wrong _life_ for that,” Jane said emphatically, holding up her hand to emphasise her tattooed skin.

“Maybe. Or maybe, a few years from now, you’ll be lazing around, feeling so bored, you can’t even stand it.” He grinned. “Probably because you tackled a suspect off a cliff and broke both your legs in the fall, and you’re in traction for a month—but my point stands. We have no idea what’s around the corner. Maybe you’re just having a few years of craziness before calm and stability set in.”

Jane snorted, amused. “Well, that sounds tedious.”

He laughed softly, his expression soft. “Yeah, that’s what I thought you’d say.”

They continued walking quietly for a minute or so, heading towards the water in the distance. The park wasn’t even half the size of New York’s Central Park, but it was big enough to take a while to walk across.

They weren’t even halfway across when a loud bang split the night, followed by several more. Instinctively, both Kurt and Jane reached for weapons they’d left in the hotel room. A fraction of a second later, they relaxed, exchanging a sheepish glance, then watching the colourful fireworks blooming and fading further along the lakeshore. It was an impressive display, even from a distance of miles away. It must have been stunning up close.

“Wonder what they’re celebrating,” Kurt mused aloud.

“Our fake anniversary?” Jane suggested lightly, her eyes on the sky.

“I’ll go with that.”

Taking in the fireworks, the shoreline and the landscaping around them, she sighed. “It’s pretty. I still prefer Central Park, though.”

“Me, too. Though I’d take this park over the one at the end of my street.”

Maybe it was just because she’d obsessed over his invitation—and her own failure to tell Kurt that she had something else she needed to do—so often since they’d failed to connect that night, but his words seemed like more than just a casual statement to Jane. She glanced sharply over at him, wondering if he was trying to bring up that night, but he was watching the fireworks, his attention nowhere near her.

Jane shrugged, keeping her voice casual. “I dunno. The water is nicer here, but your little park is cosy.”

Kurt frowned. “I didn’t know you’d spent any time there.”

_Oops._

“Uh, yeah. Sometimes I go hang out there, now the weather’s warmer. It’s a good place to sit and think, after dark.” Maybe it was a little too close to admitting the truth—that she’d been going there for a while to agonise over her situation, wishing for an alternate universe where she’d gone to the park instead of to the transmissions tower to meet Oscar. An alternate universe where Kurt had shown up, too, and where they could have started something they’d never had the chance to in reality.

“Yeah, it is. But there are parks closer to your place. Why not choose those?”

“I like yours.” _And wallowing in my mistakes there is just a masochistic bonus._

His words had been casual, but something about his posture, his expression… There was a shadow of pain about him, somehow. Jane stopped walking, stunned, as a puzzle piece clicked home in her mind.

Noticing she was no longer beside him, Kurt stopped too, doubling back to her side with a question in his demeanour.

“You were there that night, weren’t you?” she asked, her guilt rising as her certainty grew. “That night you asked me to meet you there, the first night my detail was dropped.” _After I kissed you._

He shifted uncomfortably, not meeting her eyes. “It doesn’t matter now.”

She’d hurt him so deeply by not showing up that night, and she hadn’t even suspected he’d been there until now. “Kurt… I am so sorry. I wanted to be there. I—”

“It’s okay, Jane. Water under the bridge.” His interruption held an edge, warning her to drop it.

But she couldn’t, not until he knew how much her decision still ripped her apart, even to this day. “No, it’s not okay. Please, let me explain.”

“You were with Oscar that night. I already figured it out—from your statement, after we brought you back from New Jersey.” He shrugged, clearly wishing the subject hadn’t come up.

“That night was the first time I met with him, after he rescued me from Carter. And the only way Oscar could have found where Carter took me, after I was kidnapped off the street, was if he’d followed me from my safehouse to your apartment building that night, and then halfway back, to where the kidnap happened.”

Kurt didn’t visibly flinch, but she could sense him recoiling mentally. “I…hadn’t considered that.”

“I knew he was staking out my safehouse; that he’d see that my detail was gone, right after he’d challenged me to get it dropped. If I hadn’t gone to meet him, he would have followed me to meet you. And I didn’t want anyone to watch us together, especially not my ex.”

He was quiet. Hurting, she knew. She’d screwed up by mentioning this now, but she couldn’t stand to have him think she hadn’t cared enough to show up for a moment longer.

“And, Kurt… At that time in my life, there was only _one_ thing I needed more than I needed you.”

“Answers,” he said, his eyes still on the last of the fading fireworks. Clearly, that was one thing he _had_ thought through at great length.

“Oscar had them, and after what had happened with Carter, and the video of myself…I knew I’d been wrong about so many things. I trusted you, but I couldn’t afford to trust the FBI, not when I’d never imagined the CIA would just take me off the street like that. I was afraid that I had everything wrong, and I was scared my only source of information about my past would disappear.”

“I know. I wish you’d come to me instead, but…I understand.” He was still wary, old wounds opened afresh, but he wasn’t shutting her out. That was something.

After everything that had happened this weekend, she couldn’t bear the thought that she’d made him reconsider wanting to get closer to her again. If she really wanted him to understand, she’d have to take a leap of faith. She’d been too afraid to damage their friendship by hoping for more, but now she’d damaged it anyway by bringing up the past, her previous fear seemed tiny in comparison to what he might think if she remained silent.

“I don’t think you _can_ understand,” she told him sadly. “I know that I deserved it, for standing you up, but when you told me it was too complicated for us to get into a relationship, it hurt me more than I thought anyone could. Ever since then, I’ve been driving myself crazy, wondering what might have been different if I’d gone to the park that night, and if you’d been there. What you were planning to say.”

She took a shaky breath and confessed, “These days, sometimes I go there just to imagine things are different, and you’re about to show up, and I can fix everything I screwed up, before it all goes to hell.”

She turned away, feeling too vulnerable, certain she was just making things worse by trying explain herself. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin the evening.”

When Kurt slid his arms around her waist from behind, she caught her breath. His embrace was familiar and comforting, and she was unable to stop herself from leaning back against him, despite her mental turmoil.

“Relax,” he murmured, brushing a kiss over the top of her head. “I’ve known this whole time that you stood me up, even if you didn’t realise I knew. I really have put it behind me, for the most part. I just…didn’t expect you to mention it tonight, I guess.”

Jane closed her eyes, her breath escaping in a half sob, though tears wouldn’t form. “I hate hurting you.”

“Ditto. But it wasn’t all your fault, back then. For the record, I keep wondering what might have happened if I hadn’t been such a coward that morning, when I lied and told you I didn’t show up. I should have just asked what was going on.”

“We both have regrets, then.” She sighed, letting go of some of the guilt.

He tightened his embrace. “Since you were curious… I didn’t really have much of a plan for what to say to you that night. I wanted some time alone with you. I figured we’d work something out together. Mostly, I just wanted to kiss you again.”

Jane drew in a shaky breath, fighting the urge to turn in his arms and do exactly that. “You still could…”

He gave a soft laugh right against her ear, making her skin tingle with longing. “Not here. When I kiss you again, I want the only possible interruption to be from you.”

Jane bit her lip, a warm, insistent tension beginning to coalesce low in her abdomen. “What if I don’t _want_ to interrupt you?”

Kurt nuzzled her neck, his voice almost a growl. “Then I won’t stop.”

 _Is this actually happening?_ The incredulous thought seemed distant, overwhelmed by the feeling of Kurt’s arms around her, his breath against her skin. It shouldn’t have felt much more intimate than a friendly hug, but instead, it was almost too intense to bear.

“Still want to walk down to the water?” she asked, hoping his mind was running along the same track as hers.

“Not anymore.” His tone was amused. “Come on. Let’s head back.”

As they walked back the way they’d come, the silence was comfortable, but grew more expectant by the second. Testing him, Jane once more let her fingers brush the back of Kurt’s hand.

This time, he laced his fingers through hers without hesitation, his smile understated, but so full of affection that her heart skipped in response. Whatever mental barrier had been holding him back from her this weekend, it seemed to be gone.

Jane just hoped that the demolition was permanent.


	9. All Yours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to update. My brain really wasn't working. :/ Hope this doesn't disappoint!

If Kurt had believed in the supernatural, he would have sworn Patterson had some kind of sixth sense for when he and Jane were having their deepest moments of connection—and that she’d decided to interrupt them every time she sensed it. They weren’t even two minutes into their walk back to the hotel when Jane’s phone began to vibrate, and she pulled her hand from his to answer it, murmuring a quiet apology.

 _At least this is happening now, and not ten minutes from now, when we’re back in our room,_ he mentally consoled himself, and fought the urge to switch off his own phone entirely. Only his sense of unease about Shepherd stopped him from doing so—he’d probably be more distracted with the phone off, wondering if he’d irresponsibly made himself unaware of a Sandstorm emergency, than if the phone was on. And he wanted as little distraction from Jane as possible tonight.

Jane talked with Patterson about Roman—from what Kurt could gather, they were having a fun evening, and Jane had nothing to worry about—then exchanged a couple of text messages with her brother. Meanwhile, Kurt felt his responsible side begin to prickle his conscience. None of the reasons he’d given himself for not acting on his attraction to Jane had gone away, after all. As loath as he was to give her a reason to back away from him again, he knew he had to at least bring up the subject.

Jane sighed, returning her phone to her pocket, then laced her fingers back through his. “Sorry about that. I figured that if I said goodnight to both of them, at least I wouldn’t have to worry about either of them interrupting us later.”

He nodded, squeezing her hand. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” She gave him a shy smile as they entered the hotel lobby. “I’m all yours now.”

He smiled down at her, her phrasing awakening a territorial instinct within him. “Good.”

Their room was on the seventh floor, so they made for the elevator. As the doors began to close behind them, someone called, “Hold the elevator!”

Jane lifted her hand, about to hit the button to keep the doors from closing, but before he’d even had time to consider what he was doing, Kurt caught her wrist. While she turned her surprised gaze on him, the elevator doors closed, and they began to move upwards.

“That’s not like you,” Jane said.

He stepped behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and meeting her eyes in their reflection on the mirrored wall. “I don’t wanna share you any more tonight. Not even with a random stranger, even for a minute.”

Jane leaned back against him, smiling. “I think that’s fair.”

He allowed his fingers to wander up under her shirt, brushing the warm, smooth skin of her abdomen. The shiver that passed through her tugged at his self-control, and he fought to remain relatively civilised, even as his cock began to respond to her. “I just need to…check my boundaries for tonight. You know you can say no to me, right? Since I’m your boss, and all.”

She stared at his reflection, incredulous. “Since when have I _ever_ had trouble saying no to you, Kurt?”

That made him smile, and he kissed her bird tattoo lightly, still watching her in the mirror. “You raise a good point.”

“Mmm… Feels like I’m raising more than that,” Jane said, pressing her ass back against his growing hard-on. Her body melted back against his like they were meant to fit together.

He wanted to drop the issue, to coax the glowing embers between them into sparks, then flames—but he couldn’t. “I need to say this. Because you don’t have the option of getting another room tonight, and because you’re depending on the taskforce for an immunity deal. If there’s any part of you that wants to wait, or to turn me down—”

She turned in his arms, covering his lips with her palm and holding his gaze steadily, heat and certainty in her eyes. “No. You’re not taking advantage of me, Kurt. I want this. I always have.”

He nodded, relieved, his conscience finally silent. However, doubt began to bloom on Jane’s face, and he realised his words had consequences. She brought her hand down from his mouth to rest on his shoulder, and watched him, her guard slightly raised.

“You started this discussion. Are you sure it’s not _you_ whose heart isn’t in this?”

He hated that he’d ever given her cause to doubt how strongly he felt about her, but he pushed the guilt aside, knowing it wasn’t what she needed to see. As the elevator began to slow, he cupped her face in his hand, hoping that, on some level, she could sense how deeply he loved her. “My heart knows what it wants.”

Jane traced her fingers over his face, the movement and her intense focus reminding him of the night they’d met. The silence almost shredded his nerves, stretching on a second too long before she replied quietly, “So does mine.”

He leaned in to kiss her just as the elevator doors opened with a chime, and they moved apart reflexively, though there was no one waiting on the other side of the doors.

“Even inanimate objects are interrupting us now?” Jane said, with a rueful laugh.

He put his arm around her waist, kissed her temple softly. “At least Patterson’s not standing there. Come on. Let’s go lock ourselves away for the night.”

Their room wasn’t too far from the elevator, and as Jane pulled the keycard from her pocket, Kurt stepped in close behind her, his anticipation mounting. _No more interruptions. No more doubts. Just us._

“So, that’s it? No more trying to persuade me that I don’t want what I want?” Jane pushed her ass back against him as she inserted the keycard into the lock. Kurt stifled the urge to groan, tightening his arms around her waist and taking a deep, shaky breath against her neck. He’d never be able to get enough of her scent. This close, she was driving him crazy.

“No more. I swear.” Even if his mind had still been hesitant, the rest of him—body, heart, his entire _soul_ —had given up the struggle.

The door opened, and they stumbled inside together, Jane turning to him before he even had both feet in the room. The second the door closed, she pushed him up against it, her kiss as insistent as the hands that tugged at his belt buckle.

_Jane… Oh, god, yes…_

Part of him wanted to slow her, to spend more time drinking in her kisses before he lay her down to worship her body for hours. His own impatience had other ideas, his cock aching as she unzipped his jeans. His own frantic hands were busy with her pants, opening them and yanking them clumsily down over her hips.

Jane tore her lips from his as she freed his cock from his underwear. “I’m on the pill. Don’t make me wait any longer, Kurt, _please_ —”

He slid his fingers between her legs, checking he didn’t need to turn her on more before he took her. A surprised curse of discovery fell from his lips as his touch slipped against her soaked skin, and she kissed him again, ravenous and demanding.

“Now. Please, now,” she begged.

He pushed away from the door he was leaning against, pushing Jane up against the wall nearby and replacing his fingers with his cock. Her breath caught at the feel of him against her heat, and then he was driving into her for the first time, her slickness making it easy to press deep.

_Oh, fuck…_

She was hot and welcoming, tilting her hips forward to welcome him in, and his knees weakened for an instant as he pinned her to the wall.

“Yes,” she breathed in his ear, her voice carrying a hint of a moan. “Perfect…”

Her pants still shackled her lower thighs, preventing him from spreading her further open or adjusting the angle of their joining, but just being inside her was enough for now. He kissed her again, withdrawing for a second thrust, and she distractedly began to kick off her boots, then work free of her lower clothing. Kurt continued to take her, slow and rough, grinding her against the wall and savouring her soft cries of encouragement.

Somehow, she freed one of her legs from her tight jeans, and braced her foot on the opposite wall of the small entry alcove they were standing in, allowing him to push deeper into her. Grabbing his ass with both hands, she rolled her hips urgently, encouraging him to pick up the pace.

Kurt pounded into her, groaning at the feel of her body clenching around him, wet and tight. Every thrust unravelled his self-control, and he reached down to find Jane’s clit, wanting to make sure she was with him the whole way. Her breath left her in a ragged cry of encouragement, her internal muscles squeezing him tightly, and he gazed down at her, committing her expression of desperate lust to memory.

“More,” she pleaded, canting her hips back and forth in a quick, frenzied counter to his every movement. “Take me, Kurt—I won’t break…”

His own pleasure mounting with each of her breathless instructions, he freed himself from the last of his cautious restraint, plunging into her with deep, hard, rapid thrusts that jolted the breath from them both. Panting, gasping his name, Jane dug her fingernails into his ass, her body rigid and trembling.

“Don’t stop, don’t—oh, _Kurt!_ ”

He growled approval against his shoulder, slowing down to feel her undulations become languid and decadent. Her climax rippled around his cock, testing his control, and as she clutched his shoulders for support, he gave in to his most primal urges, slamming her back against the wall. The swell of pleasure became white-hot pulses that made him cry out, driving deep as he spilled within her.

Savouring the ebbing aftershocks, he lifted Jane off her feet, and she wound her arms and legs around him with an unintelligible murmur. His legs unsteady, he carried her the short distance over to the bed, laying her down on the mattress. Jane refused to let him go, so he wound up on top of her, their bodies still joined.

“So good,” she whispered, nuzzling his neck.

“Understatement,” he murmured back, rolling over so that he didn’t crush her beneath him.

Jane lifted her head and smiled down into his eyes, satisfaction and mischief in her face. “And we didn’t even need the bed.”

He brushed her hair out of her eyes, laughing under his breath. “The night’s still young.”

She kissed him, slow and gentle, far more tender than any of the kisses they’d shared in the doorway. Kurt gathered her closer, relaxed and contented, his mind completely at peace for the first time in what seemed like a lifetime. They were still wearing most of their clothing—Kurt hadn’t even gotten around to getting rid of his shoes or pants—but he couldn’t bring himself to care about the rumpled, half-dressed state they were in. They were together, and the rest was just details.

_Jane… I love you so much._


	10. Waking Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter after this one! But first, Jeller finally get to enjoy sharing a bed without worrying about making each other uncomfortable or giving each other the wrong/right idea. Since it took them a little while to get there the night before... ;)

For the second morning in a row, Jane woke up with Kurt’s arm around her, his comforting warmth at her back. _I could get used to this._

This morning, things were different—they were both naked, for one thing. As Jane burrowed back deeper into his embrace, his morning wood brushed against her tailbone. Her imagination immediately sparked into life, suggesting a number of intriguing possibilities.

Kurt tightened his arm around her, nuzzling the back of her neck. “You awake?”

“No,” Jane told him, not bothering to open her eyes or turn over. She was far too comfortable where she was.

She could hear the smile in his voice when he replied, “Me neither. But I’m having the best dream…”

Jane gave a soft murmur of approval as he kissed her neck. “Mmmm, me too.”

They were quiet for a while, just breathing, relaxing, enjoying each other’s presence. Jane was still half asleep, too lazy to do anything about the lust at the back of her mind, and it seemed as though Kurt was in a similar state.

She realised she was smiling, truly contented for the first time in longer than she could remember. Her life was far from perfect, and her worries and fears would return, but right now, she was peaceful, calm.

“I’m so glad we finally got here,” she said softly. The words were inadequate to express how she was feeling, but so much less terrifying than _I love you._

“Yeah?” Kurt slid his hand up from her stomach, pressing the heel of his hand against her heart as he cupped her left breast. “I was about to do this yesterday, when that damn alarm interrupted us.”

The desire she’d been ignoring grew stronger, dispelling her sleepiness. Jane laid her hand over his, arching back against his body a little more firmly. “I was thinking up so many things I wanted to do. Wanted _you_ to do…”

“Care to share?” He ground against her in return, his fingers teasing her nipple.

“This, for a start.” She continued to shift her hips, enjoying the hitch in his breathing. “I couldn’t tell if you were awake, in more ways than one.”

He nipped her neck, then soothed her skin with his tongue. “I made sure there was enough blanket between us. Didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“I don’t know if I could have kept still if I’d felt you yesterday,” she confessed, then lost her train of thought as he slid his hand down her body, his fingers coming to a stop just above where she needed to feel him. “Kurt…”

“You did start to move, just for a moment.” As she parted her thighs, encouraging him to touch her, he laughed under his breath. “I nearly went crazy, trying to stay put.”

Impatient, she grabbed his wrist and dragged his hand lower. With a growl of appreciation for how wet she was, he cupped her sensitive mound and soaked his fingers, then stroked up to her clit. “And I wanted to do this.”

“I wanted you to.” She moaned under her breath at his perfect touches, reaching back behind her to find his cock. “I wondered what you’d do if I rolled over and kissed you. If you’d pull me on top of you and let me rub myself all over you…”

“You should try it and see.” He thrust into her hand urgently, his obvious need making her wetter, hotter.

_Yes. Yes…_

Jane gave in to temptation, turning over to face him, and the undisguised hunger on his face made her heart leap. Kurt dragged her astride his hips, kissed her the way she’d wanted him to since the moment she’d first woken up, and she fought the urge to just guide his cock deep into her without any further teasing. But she was having too much fun provoking them both with words and actions, so she rubbed her slickness all over his shaft instead, making Kurt groan into her mouth.

“Jane,” he breathed, the moment they broke the kiss. “Let me in.”

The plea in his voice broke her resolve to keep teasing him, and she reached down between them, giving him one slow, firm stroke before angling her hips just right. Kurt pushed steadily inside her, a soft curse falling from his lips.

Last night, their first time had been rushed, desperate, as though they’d been trying to make up for lost time. Their second time had been far more thorough, as they discovered each other’s bodies with their hands and lips, taking delight in each other’s reactions until they could bear no more pleasure.

This was different again, their movements languid and sensual as they rocked together. Jane relished the feel of him within her, lacing her fingers through his. Kurt kissed her neck, her jaw, her lips, taking her with smooth, almost lazy thrusts from below.

Neither of them would come any time soon if they kept this pace, but Jane didn’t care. The joy of their shared movements, the affection in their intimate embrace, the smile in his eyes when he gazed up at her—those things were fulfilling on a different level.

Then he slipped his devious fingers over her clit, and the mood of their coupling changed rapidly. While she cried out his name, riding him fast and hard towards completion, he pushed her towards the edge with insistent thrusts. Pleasure overwhelmed her, and she collapsed onto his chest as he slammed up into her, driving himself the rest of the way towards his own release.

Catching herself before she could whisper that she loved him, Jane nuzzled his shoulder, breathless. “I know we planned to go see the sights today, but I just want to stay in bed here, with you…”

Kurt pulled the blanket up over them as much as he could, without interrupting their exhausted snuggling. “We have to check out by eleven, but if we plan to come back here after we finish the Sandstorm case, we could do a full weekend of sightseeing so we can fit everything in. So that would give us a few extra hours in bed today…”

Jane smiled against his skin. “Sounds perfect.”

Kurt wrapped his arms tighter around her, sighing. “I’m getting used to falling asleep and waking up with you. My bed’s gonna feel pretty cold and empty tonight.”

She laughed. “Well, I don’t want to leave Roman alone again tonight, but maybe tomorrow night I could come over and warm things up for you?”

“I’m gonna hold you to that,” he told her, his voice more serious than she’d expected.

She lifted her head to smile down at him. “Good.”

He stroked his fingers over her cheek, gazing at her as though he was planning to say something else. But then he shook his head slightly and pulled her down for a kiss that made her forget everything but them.

* * *

They lingered in bed for as long as possible, but as their checkout time drew near, they had to get up—neither of them wanted to risk being interrupted by the hotel’s housekeeping staff. After checking out, they managed to fit a trip to the aquarium in before their mid-afternoon flight back to New York City.

Jane seemed inspired by the large tanks of tropical fish, taking a few photos, but then deleting them when they didn’t turn out the way she wanted. Her artistic side was usually hidden while she was on the job, and Kurt spent about as much time watching her as he did the marine life, enjoying her fascination.

They were quiet on the flight back to New York, the close proximity of other passengers stifling their urge to talk. Kurt read a little more of his book, while Jane rested her head on his shoulder and took a nap.

Remembering how terrified she’d been the first time they’d flown, Kurt couldn’t help but smile at the contrast in her now. She’d ceased to be afraid of flying once she’d successfully landed a plane without power—the memory of their close call was enough to turn his stomach—but this was the first time he’d ever seen her relax on a flight before.

Then again, it was also the first flight they’d taken after keeping each other awake most of the night—though if Kurt had it his way, it wouldn’t be the last.

He gently stroked her hair as the distinctive skyline of New York City came into view. “You with me, Jane? We’re nearly home.”

“Mmm…” She sat up with a stifled yawn. “Guess I was sleepier than I thought.”

He laced his fingers through hers. “Gonna go back to bed when you get home?”

“On my own?” she asked, her voice quiet enough that no one else could overhear. “Where’s the fun in that?”

Somehow, he managed to keep himself from kissing the playful expression from her lips, but it was a close call.

While they waited for a cab back from the airport—he’d given Zapata his keys during their hurried goodbyes on Friday, since he wouldn’t be using his car, and she’d need transport—he attempted to get his thoughts in order. The weekend had been a much-needed break from reality, but they were returning to that reality now, and they had to decide how to handle this.

“So… When Roman asks how your weekend went, what are you gonna tell him?”

Jane shrugged, seeming a little uncertain. “I guess I hadn’t thought about it. I don’t… I mean…” She frowned up at him. “When you were dating Nas, you kept it a secret.”

He hadn’t even been sure she’d known about him and Nas. “Not very well, apparently.”

She shrugged. “You tried, at least. I guess I… Is that what you want? To keep this quiet?”

The conflicted expression on her face wrenched at his heart, and he tried to explain. “The thing with Nas… We didn’t want it interfering with the taskforce.” _And it wasn’t serious. At least,_ I _wasn’t serious._

Jane nodded, and though she didn’t move, he could sense her emotionally pulling back. “It makes sense. I might need to tell Roman, if I’m gonna spend nights at your place. But I can make sure he won’t say anything to the rest of the team—”

He couldn’t find the right words to stop her subtle retreat, and he couldn’t bear to watch her close herself off any further. Letting instinct guide him, he pulled her into a kiss, sensing her surprise as he cut off her words with the gesture.

The kiss was brief, but by the time he pulled back, her expression had softened a little.

“You and me? We’re different,” he told her, before she could voice her confusion. “We’re…more.”

She nodded slowly, seeming as lost for words as he was. “Okay.”

They reached the front of the taxi line, which interrupted their conversation—but once they were in the cab, beginning their journey towards Brooklyn, Jane shyly reached for his hand. He squeezed hers in reassurance, searching for the right words.

“It’s gonna be a balancing act - keeping things professional at work. But…honestly? It always has been, with you. The team already know things have been complicated between us.”

Jane nodded, but remained quiet.

“At the office, we need things to be normal. But if they happen to see us holding hands during drinks after work…” He shrugged. “That’s fine by me.”

She gazed up at him, her eyes amused. “I promise not to make out with you during Patterson’s briefings.”

He couldn’t help but grin at the mental image. “Thank you. I think.”

When the taxi reached Jane’s apartment, he cupped her face in his hand and gave her a tender, lingering kiss, not caring that the taxi driver was waiting for her to leave the vehicle. Jane leaned into his touch, her expression as conflicted as he felt, while he told her, “I’ll call you later.”

She nodded, reaching for the door handle. “Okay. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.”

“You, too.”

One brief peck on the lips, and then she was gone, the slam of the taxi’s door an abrupt end to their impromptu weekend trip together. Kurt leaned back in his seat, sighing, as the taxi pulled back into traffic. He’d known she had to go back to her safehouse, but he’d underestimated how powerfully he already missed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I'd love to hear what you think of the chapter, how things have turned out for Jeller, or how you think the team (and Roman) are going to take the news, in the final chapter... Feedback is fangirl fuel! x


	11. Taken Aback

Jane pushed open the door to her safehouse, her mind still preoccupied by her parting from Kurt. When a startled gasp and a clatter met her ears, her attention was wrenched out of its rut.

“Oh, my god— _Jane_ …”

Patterson stood in the kitchen, wearing only a towel wrapped around her torso,. A bowl of cereal was partially upended on the counter, and she was staring at Jane with all-encompassing horror, her mussed, damp hair lending a comedic touch to the scene.

“This isn’t what it looks like,” Patterson said in a rush.

Shocked, reflexive laughter bubbled up inside her, but Jane fought to maintain a straight face. “It, uh, looks like you and Roman did more than just play board games last night.”

Patterson covered her face with her hands and groaned. “We did. We totally did. Roman said you wouldn’t be back for another hour, and I was just gonna eat this cereal and then go. This…this wasn’t how I wanted you to find out. I’m sorry.”

She blew out a breath and waited for Jane’s judgment.

Which meant that Jane had to figure out how she felt about this whole thing, and her brain was still too taken aback to process it all.

“So…where’s Roman?” she asked hesitantly.

“He was in the shower. I think he just shut the water off as you got in.” Patterson abandoned the cereal and began to pick clothing up off the floor, her face flushing with embarrassment. “I’ll just, um, I’ll get dressed and I’ll…I’ll go. You’re probably tired after your trip, so…”

Jane set down her go bag on the nearby table, and stooped to pick up a bundle of cloth, realising only as she straightened that it was Patterson’s shirt, her bra still tangled inside it. “Uhhh, here.”

“Thanks.” Patterson took the clothing from her, avoiding her eyes. “God, this is…awkward.”

“Yeah,” Jane agreed, and they both laughed, breaking the tension slightly.

“Hey.” Roman’s voice came from the doorway, filled with trepidation. He was dressed in sweatpants and a T-shirt, which had clearly been pulled on in a hurry. “I thought your flight was only getting in about now.”

“Nope. The text said I’d be _home_ about now.” Jane sighed and picked up her bag. “I’m gonna go unpack.”

Roman and Patterson exchanged a swift, panicked glance, and Jane stared at them both, putting the pieces together. “You spent the night in _my_ bed? Roman!”

Patterson studiously began to clean up spilled cereal as Roman sighed. “Look, sis, I’m sorry. I know this is…weird.”

Jane pushed past him into the bedroom, stifling an irritated noise at the disarray he’d left her personal space in.

“I’ve been sleeping on the couch, remember? There’s only one bed in the house, and you weren’t using it. I, uh, was planning to change the sheets before you came back,” Roman added, his voice sheepish. He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. “I’ll get it done before you go to bed tonight, I swear.”

She wanted to be back on the road trip with Kurt so badly at that moment. Biting her tongue, she dumped her dirty laundry into the hamper in the corner of the room, then set about refilling her go bag for the next emergency—a few pairs of underwear, a spare sports bra, some socks, pyjama pants and T-shirts. _I should just take this right now and go over to Kurt’s…_

_Wait._

She spun to face the doorway, but Roman had retreated. Following the sounds of a quiet argument back to the living room, she found Patterson struggling into her shirt while Roman retrieved various items of his own clothing from the floor.

They both looked up guiltily as she came in. “You know what? Don’t worry about it. I’m gonna go crash at Kurt’s.”

Patterson’s brows rose, a small smile at the corners of her lips. If the situation had been different, Jane might have allowed herself to be drawn in for some gossip, but she still needed time to process before she could act normal around her friend.

“You’re over-reacting,” Roman protested.

“You had sex in my bed.”

“We’re both consenting adults—”

“I’m not saying you can’t have sex, I just… I need a little time where I don’t have to be around you, while I try to wrap my head around this. Patterson is one of my best friends.” Before he could reply, she added to Patterson, “And Roman is my _brother_.”

“I know. I know.” Patterson held up her hands as Roman came to stand protectively beside her. “Just…take your time. We can talk about it tomorrow, maybe?”

“Yeah. See you guys tomorrow.”

Jane headed for the door, still conflicted about this whole thing. As she opened it, Patterson added, “For what it’s worth, I’m happy that you and Kurt…” She interrupted herself before Jane could reply, taking her cue from the incredulous look on her friend’s face. “You know what? This isn’t the time for that conversation, so, um…bye.”

“Bye.” Jane made her escape before her mind could unravel any further.

* * *

Kurt had just finished unpacking, and was considering what to make as a snack, when there was a familiar knock on the door.

_No… Can’t be her. I just dropped her off less than an hour ago._

Even so, his hopes rose as he crossed to the apartment door. Pulling it open without checking the peephole first, he broke into a smile. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Jane looked up at him, seeming a little shy. “I, uh… I was kind of hoping I could stay here tonight. I know that wasn’t the plan, but…”

He silenced her with a quick kiss, then drew her into the apartment. “Sure you can. Did something happen with Roman?”

“You could say that.” Exasperation colouring her tone, Jane pushed the door shut behind her and let her bag slide to the ground. He held her lightly by the hips, not wanting to smother her with too much affection while her mind was preoccupied, but unable to help but remain in contact with her.

“Is he okay?” Kurt was reasonably sure the answer was ‘yes’—she never would have left his side otherwise—but he couldn’t quite get a read on the situation.

Jane rolled her eyes. “Oh, he’s fine. All that worrying I was doing about him last night? Totally unnecessary, because Patterson was kissing him all better. In my bed.”

Kurt’s mind came to a standstill for a moment as he adjusted to the idea. “Patterson and _Roman_?”

Jane nodded, outrage and amusement both blooming in her expression.

Kurt attempted to keep a straight face. “Do I want to know how you found this out?”

“Patterson was pouring cereal in my kitchen as I walked through the door. Dressed in nothing but a towel. And there were clothes all over the floor.” Jane rested her forehead on his shoulder, a small grunt of annoyance muffled between them. “I should have handled it better than I did, but…”

Kurt allowed himself a quick grin before he pressed his lips to the top of her head. “Come on, let’s grab some coffee and sit down. Unless you need something stronger. You know—for the shock.”

“Don’t tempt me,” Jane grumbled, lifting her head to look up at him again. Her eyes softened. “Coffee’s good. Thanks.”

Kurt had been waiting for a new pot to brew as he’d pondered the refrigerator. It was just about done, but he couldn’t help but give his partner another soft, lingering kiss before he moved away. Jane was more addictive than caffeine could ever be.

He poured them each a mug of black coffee as she leaned against the breakfast bar, then handed one to her, his skin tingling as their fingers brushed.

“Thanks,” Jane said softly, smiling down at the mug.

He took his own mug and led the way to the couch, speaking over his shoulder. “You know, this reminds me of when I found out Reade was dating my sister. Seems like years ago, but it wasn’t long after you first came to us.”

“I actually forgot about that,” Jane admitted, sitting beside him and folding one leg beneath her. “I remember you were angry, but there was a lot going on around that time. We never really talked about it.”

Kurt sighed, thinking back to his mishandling of the situation. “Yeah. I just…” He caught himself. “You should be the one talking right now.”

Jane snorted. “Please. I would _really_ rather focus on your sibling issues than mine right now.”

“Okay.” He sipped his coffee, marshalling his thoughts. “We were in the middle of the Fischer thing when Reade told me. He was afraid I’d hear it from someone else because of his polygraph. Said he’d never found the right time to tell me. Later, I asked him if it was serious between him and Sarah, and when he said it was, I just told him to end it and walked off.”

Jane took his hand. “I can understand the reaction. My head is kind of spinning with the idea of Patterson and Roman, so…”

He squeezed her hand. “You probably handled them better than I handled Sarah.”

Jane frowned up at him. “What happened?”

“I let my own issues get in the way. You know how dangerous our job is, and…all I could see when I looked at Reade was someone I had to protect, if I wanted Sarah to be happy.”

“Oh, Kurt…” Jane leaned her head against his shoulder.

“I know. I knew how happy he made her. She’d been coming home for weeks from dates and sleepovers, looking happier than I’d seen her for years. But as soon as I found out who she was dating, I couldn’t see that. All I could imagine was the worst case scenario. I just imagined having to tell her that I’d let her boyfriend die in the field; imagined her hating me for not protecting Reade better.”

He sipped his coffee, then shook his head. “I yelled at Sarah that I couldn’t do it, that the pressure of having to protect everyone all the time was just breaking me. She packed her stuff and started to move out the next day.”

“Oh, no,” Jane murmured sympathetically. “You must have felt horrible.”

“It wasn’t my finest hour,” he agreed, shame returning to him with the memory. “We talked it out later, but I wish I hadn’t reacted that strongly.”

“You’re only human,” Jane said. “And feeling responsible for Reade’s safety was something you did anyway, even before Sarah started dating him.”

“Yeah.” Kurt dragged his mind back to the present. “I know you’re not Patterson’s boss or anything, but…”

Jane deflated a little. “After what happened with Borden, and David, I just… I don’t want to see her get hurt again. The end of her last two relationships were technically my fault, and—”

“No, they weren’t,” Kurt interrupted, not caring that he was cutting her off. “Patterson doesn’t blame you. None of us hold you responsible for that.”

“Even so, it was my tattoo that led to David’s death.”

“No. David was trying to be an agent. He wasn’t qualified, and he had no backup. He was out of his depth. You and Patterson can argue all day over whether you or she could have done more to save him, but it won’t change what happened, Jane.” Kurt met her eyes steadily. “And Borden? He played all of us. You didn’t know he was a mole until around the same time Patterson did.”

“I guess,” Jane said, sounding anything but convinced.

“But I get why you’re worried about her with Roman.” Kurt attempted to pull her out of the spiral of self-recrimination, kissing her temple gently.

“Roman… He’s my brother, and I love him so much, but what happened to him as a kid really screwed him up. He’s not—” She caught herself mid-syllable, guilt in her eyes.

Kurt filled in what he guessed she’d been about to say. “Stable.”

“Yeah.” Jane stared into her coffee cup unhappily. “I know I can’t compare before the ZIP to how he is now, and he was having a breakdown when he was in the cell because of his claustrophobia, but he’s gonna need a lot of help. I don’t want Patterson taking that on. She needs a partner who can steady _her._ ”

“I know.” It worried Kurt, too. These days, he thought of Patterson like a little sister—he couldn’t stand to see her suffering, especially after Borden’s final betrayal.

Jane scowled. “And Patterson—I know I asked her to take care of Roman, but she slept with him. In _my_ bed.”

Imagining how he would have felt if he’d found out Reade and Sarah had been in his own bed, Kurt winced. “In Roman’s defence, I guess the ankle monitor meant they couldn’t go anywhere else.”

“And she knows he’s traumatised,” Jane continued, ignoring Kurt’s words. “He doesn’t have his head on straight right now. They’re _both_ traumatised, and…”

She trailed off with a sigh. “They’re grown adults. It’s none of my business. At least, it wouldn’t be, if they’d gotten dressed and changed the sheets before I got home. I can’t control how they feel about each other. I just wish it didn’t feel like a disaster waiting to happen, you know?”

“I know. But whatever happens, we’ll help them through it.” _I hope._

“I just feel so responsible,” Jane half-whispered.

“You’re already doing so much for Roman. And I know how much Patterson values your friendship, too. You can’t take the whole world on your shoulders, Jane.”

Even as he spoke, he knew what her response would be. Sadly amused, she nudged him with her shoulder. “You should take your own advice, sometimes.”

“Nah. Easier to deal it out to other people.”

She laughed despite herself, then leaned over to the coffee table to put down her mug. When she turned back to him, her expression was wearily affectionate.

“Thank you,” she told him.

“For what?”

“More things than I can count. But most recently, for listening. And for giving me a place to crash while my brother and my best friend are building a love nest in my safehouse.”

“Let’s not think about that.” Kurt set down his own mug and pulled Jane into his lap. “Right now, I’m just gonna focus on how happy I am that you’re here. Though I should probably tell you the bad news now.”

Jane blinked down at him, waiting with a slight frown for the ‘bad news’.

“There’s only one adult-sized bed in the apartment, so we’re gonna have to share again.” He grinned as she gave his arm a light punch in retaliation for misleading her.

“Yeah, that sounds _awful._ ” She laughed as he nuzzled her neck. “But somehow, I guess we’ll make the best of it.”

“Somehow.” He nipped her earlobe teasingly.

She ran her fingers down his arm, her voice becoming huskier. “I just hope we can get more sleep tonight than we did last night. You know, since we might have to dodge bullets in the morning?”

“Hmm. I was hoping the bullet-dodging could wait until noon, at least.” Kurt kissed her jaw, and she immediately turned her head to guide his lips to hers.

_I will never get tired of kissing this woman._

He wasn’t sure if the kiss lasted a minute or an hour. All that mattered was that it consumed them both equally, until they broke apart with breathless smiles, heat in their shared gaze.

“Maybe if we get the distracting stuff out of the way before bedtime, we can get a good night’s sleep?” Jane suggested softly.

“I think you’re underestimating how much I want to distract you. But it’s worth a try.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is probably the end of the fic! I haven't made Jeller say 'I love you' yet, but I'm really not sure if I have anything in my head for a last chapter, so I don't want to force it. So I'm going to mark this fic as complete and then un-complete it if inspiration strikes at a later date. Thank you all so much for reading! I'd love to know what you thought of the story. :)


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